Women’s Edition: 5 POWERFUL Lessons A Millionaire Taught Me About Life, Wealth & Success (Audiobook)

Women’s Edition: 5 POWERFUL Lessons A Millionaire Taught Me About Life, Wealth & Success (Audiobook)

Women’s Edition: 5 POWERFUL Lessons A Millionaire Taught Me About Life, Wealth & Success (Audiobook) five lessons a millionaire taught me for
women by Richard Paul Evans read by the author hello I’m Richard Paul Evans
before you hear this book there are five things you deserve to know one I wrote
the five lessons to make you rich not me I believe that most get rich books are
written to make the author rich I didn’t want my readers to think that about my
book in a possibly discount its message I solved this problem by giving away all
my author royalties from the five lessons to help abuse children I will
continue to give away my author royalties from this edition as well to
the story of my millionaire mentor is true my millionaire mentor Carey Heinz
taught me these powerful lessons when I was a twelve-year-old boy though mr.
Heinz is now retired I am fortunate that my relationship with this wonderful man
and his family continues to this day three the principles in this book work
in good times and bad in fact they work exceptionally well in both I’ve spent a
lifetime proving them I’ve also heard from women around the world whose lives
have been changed by these principles the forward to this book written by my
niece Heather is a great example of how powerfully these principles can work if
you follow them you will see financial change in your life likely much faster
than you expect for the acquisition of money is a
psychological process these five lessons work so well because they take into
account natural psychological tendencies the fact that these principles are
simple to follow does not make them less effective the simplicity of the process
is it’s genius five like you I’ve also made financial mistakes I think I’ve
made every mistake I write about in this book every time I step from the path of
the five lessons I paid for it literally my mistakes have only proven to me the
importance and efficacy of these lessons may you wisely learn from my mistakes
instead of your own in the course of writing a book for women I encounter two
primary difficulties first no definition of a specific social
group will apply to all of its members ever there are exceptions in every group
in money matters there are women who are financial geniuses and those who
struggle to balance their checkbook in writing this book I decided to reach
women at the most basic level to help as many as possible second the ability to
substantiate useable research was often hampered by people or groups with
political agendas not surprisingly I frequently came across contradictory
reports about women’s financial trends this book isn’t a political treatise the
sole purpose and agenda of this book is to help women succeed financially period
in these difficult economic times and with the challenges women face today
nothing could be more important in the face of contradictory information I’ve
chosen to rely on my personal observations and research over the past
three years I’ve had the privilege of sharing the five lessons with thousands
of women I’ve heard their stories firsthand and read about their
experiences through letters and emails I’ve personally mentored groups of women
for months at a time I have an entire notebook filled with personal financial
anecdotes sent in by women the composite of these experiences has helped me paint
a picture of where women are in the financial world not every woman but the
majority of them one of the beneficial results my interactions is that I’ve
identified five mistakes women frequently make when it comes to money
these include unenlightened beliefs about money undervaluing their assets
burnt toast syndrome investment paralysis and over trusting this book
contains proven solutions for each of these problems every principle in this
book has been tested by women I’ve seen firsthand these principles dramatically
change women’s attitudes and lives as the father of four daughters I have a
vested interest in helping women live better happier and more fulfilling lives
that’s my sincere hope for you I wish you good fortune in your new life foreword by Heather McVeigh
it’s hard to believe that just a few years ago my life was so different
financially I was in a downward spiral that showed no sign of turning around
how did I get here was a question that was constantly on my
mind where did we go wrong my name is Heather McVeigh and I am Richard Paul
Evans nice and I might add if it wasn’t for me you probably wouldn’t be hearing
about the five lessons because my story was one of the reasons for the original
book when I saw firsthand the power of these lessons and experienced the joy
and freedom these lessons brought I urged my uncle to share these five
secrets with everyone around the world they say turnabout is fair play so as he
wrote the original five lessons book he came back and asked me to share my story
my immediate response was no way it was too embarrassing I didn’t want people to
know how about our financial situation had been I’m glad I changed my mind
we were probably not too different from you trying to raise our family and
working hard to make ends meet my success with living the five lessons
completely changed my life and if sharing my story would inspire just one
person to experience the joy we found then I had to share I’m pleased to say
it has helped thousands change their lives my husband and I began our life
together in love and struggling as college
students I always assumed that once my husband graduated from college our
financial life would turn around graduation came and went but life also
changed we purchased our first new vehicle and we bought our first home and
our first baby arrived all of these life changes contributed to our financial
troubles over those early years we fell into bad financial habits we were not
living extravagantly but we were living beyond our means we would run up our
credit card paying for groceries diapers and everyday life the first time we
maxed out our credit card we took out a home equity line of credit to pay it off
this became a convenient awful pattern back then the real estate market was
strong every time we built some equity in our
home we’d refinance to pay off our newest credit card debt we took money
from everywhere we could we paid off a vehicle not once or even twice but three
times because we kept borrowing money against it
I just didn’t get it my husband was working three jobs and I was working
nearly full time while raising three children I couldn’t understand why we
were never able to get ahead or even to make ends meet something had to change
then one day I decided that I had had enough of the frustration and the stress
that’s when I had a life-changing conversation with my uncle Richard he
was financially successful and I was hoping he could give me some advice on
how to turn our lives around uncle Richard invited my husband and me
out to dinner to talk about our financial situation I was all for it
however my husband was very hesitant he was embarrassed at our financial
situation and didn’t want anyone to know about our issues but after considering
the trouble we were in he changed his mind that night over sushi we were
taught the five lessons and we made the commitment that would change our lives
inspired by what we had learned we decided to be wealthy we began by
starting a nest egg and making simple changes like cooking more meals at home
and limiting the restaurants we ate at I began thinking about every purchase was
this purchase a need or a want I learned that I had been spending money to fill
an emotional void how could I have missed that about myself the amazing
thing about living the five lessons was that I didn’t feel like I was missing
out on anything in life in fact I was living a better life
living the five lessons was bringing me and my family true happiness to build
our nest egg we began collecting silver coins instead of going out to lunch
every day with coworkers I would walk to a coin shop and purchase a piece of
silver this helped my waistline as well as my nest egg watching our nest egg
grow was satisfying and we involved our children in the excitement to them our
silver was like a pirate treasure and they would stock it up and
count it soon they wanted to save too this was just one of the many happy
side-effects I found in living the five lessons another benefit was that my
marriage and my family relationships improved we were working on goals
together and communicating much much better my husband and I did not want to
disappoint each other if one of us fell or made a mistake the other would
provide encouragement to get us back on track
we were in this together the five lessons were powerful and motivating and
living them became almost an obsession for me some of my former weaknesses
became strengths I took my spending habits and turn them
into saving habits I got good at saving money being financially responsible
brought independence and it was fun I was no longer dependent upon the credit
card company or the bank we had our first debt-free Christmas within just 15
months we were completely out of debt with a nest egg of more than $30,000 now
almost half a decade after learning the five lessons we have created a new
financial pattern that we hope will help us retire not just as millionaires but
multimillionaires our life is full of opportunities and we’re no longer
focused on debt instead we can focus on our family and on living the challenges
of parenthood are enough without the worry and pain of debt
life is good my husband and I have traveled all over the world we have nice
things and we’ve been able to help others now it’s your turn to learn from
my uncle I urge you to follow his advice just as we did and just as he did from
his millionaire mentor am i grateful that I learned the five lessons what do
you think preface again Richard Paul Evans let me
tell you why I wrote a book especially for women these are difficult times
today most people aren’t hoping for a yacht they’re praying for a lifeboat
especially women in today’s economic climate the challenges women face
financially have never been greater that’s why I’ve adapted the original
five lessons book to specifically help women truthfully I never expected the
five lessons a millionaire taught me about life and wealth to become an
international bestseller as pleased as I was with the book success I was equally
pleased to discover that women were especially receptive to its message
however the more I interacted with women in conferences and mentoring the more
apparent it became that I needed to adapt to five lessons in a way that
would meet woman’s specific needs the five lessons is about hope hope for
women hope for families women have always had a varied and complex
relationship with money and it’s getting more complicated in the past few decades
the relationship between women and money has become more entangled than at any
other time in history love it or hate it women and money are inseparable partners
a recent Pew study found that married women claimed to control the family
purse strings two to one over their husbands and are also more than twice as
likely to have the final say on major household purchases in fact more than
eighty percent of all consumer expenditures are made by women women
aren’t just spending more they’re earning more the number of women with
six-figure incomes has quadrupled in the past decade among women with business
degrees sixty percent now out earned their
husbands this trend is likely to not only continue but increase consider this
fact the average American with a college degree earns approximately twice as much
as a person without one and at the current rate by the end of this decade
women will be receiving 50% more college degrees than men women’s influence with
money extends much further than their own homes they now control more than
half of all expenditures in corporate America currently 38% of businesses are
owned by women contributing more than three point six trillion dollars to the
US economy today more than half of all new businesses in the United States are
started by women with all indications that this will continue well into the
future perhaps the most relevant of all
financial trends for women is this more than 80% of all women and their
dependents will be financially reliant on themselves at some point during their
lives unfortunately too many women are not prepared to deal with this reality
outdated beliefs about money and women not only weaken women’s ability to
create their own financial success but actually endanger them and those they
love the five lessons contained in this book if followed will lead to wealth and
financial independence I know they’ve worked in my life and they’ve worked in
the lives of thousands of women I’ve counseled over the past 20 years but
more important than material wealth these five lessons offer freedom in a
world increasingly intent on creating financial slavery the five lessons a
millionaire taught me for women is more than a book it’s the first step in a
revolution aimed at freeing women helping them take back their lives their
homes and their liberty I invite you to join our movement the gifted millionaire
who taught me these principles did so as an act of kindness and generosity I am
pleased to follow in his footsteps I dedicate this book to all the wonderful
women in my life introduction hard times when I was 12 years old my father a
building contractor fell through a stairwell on a construction site and
shattered the bones in both of his legs my father was our family’s only source
of income so when the accident left him with no income massive medical bills and
no disability or medical insurance the financial result was devastating I come
from a family of eight children and money had always been tight but now as
my father lay in bed unable to work for nearly a year we were in real trouble we
were forced to sell our home and move into a three-bedroom duplex
I slept on the floor outside the kitchen for two years it was a time of fear
mostly I was afraid of what would happen to my parents I was afraid that my
father would go to jail for not paying his bills I remember a man standing at
the doorstep yelling at my mother because we were late on rent I also
remember the embarrassment of telling a friend that he couldn’t call me because
her phone had been turned off the Chinese have a saying when the student
is ready the teacher will appear this is what happened to me during this
difficult time a man in our area a multi-millionaire named Kerry Heinz
invited the youth to a free lecture at the neighborhood church he wanted to
teach us about money we were confident that he knew something about the subject
he owned the number one basketball team in America drove an expensive car and
owned real estate and businesses all over the West
he was also completely self-made he came from ashton idaho a tiny farm town with
only 2,000 residents if he told us you count the dogs and chickens he was born
during the Great Depression and like so many others during that time his family
was destitute they rented two rooms in the back of someone else’s house they
had no running water and in the freezing northern Idaho climate the only source
of heat was a small stove they cooked with he learned to work as soon as he
could walk digging a potatoes on local farms alongside the migrant workers
he had come a long way since then he was now the wealthiest man I knew the first
thing Kerry Heinz did that day was to pull a hundred-dollar bill from his
wallet and hold it up in front of us I stared in wonder I had never seen one
before he asked his money evil well even though
wasn’t evil we all wanted we all quickly agreed that it was we were after all in
a church the Bible said a teenaged girl piously
says that money is the root of all evil our mentor smiled you are referring to
the New Testament scripture in 1st Timothy chapter 6 verse 10 he replied
and it does not say that it says that the love of money is the root of all
evil there’s a big difference in fact just
one chapter earlier in Timothy the Apostle Paul
says that if any provide not for his own he hath denied the faith and is worse
than an infidel how can you provide for your own without money how about the
parable of the Good Samaritan Jesus told us to be like the Good Samaritan yet how
many of you here today could afford to pay for a stranger’s hospital treatment
and housing for a week the Samaritan was able to help because he had the
financial means to do so without it he could only have offered minor assistance
he continued this church were sitting in right now where did it come from we
didn’t know churches just kind of grew this church was built through the
generous contributions of others he looked us over for many religion seems
paradoxical on the subject of wealth on the one hand it seems to tell us that
money is evil on the other hand God often blesses the righteous with wealth
and material prosperity for instance in the Old Testament after Jobe endured his
many trials improved his devotion to God he was given back twice his wealth and
possessions so as God rewarding jobs righteousness with evil well of course
not our teachers Tom became more serious like most things money can be used for
good or evil every week I see people in our area being helped through the
generosity and financial ability of others at your age you have no idea how
much money is spent on your behalf often times by people you will never meet and
never think the day will come when you must make a decision will you be one who
helps others or one who looks to others for help it’s your choice you can be
part of the problem or part of the solution if you want to be the latter
than listen carefully because what I have to tell you today will change your
life fear is a great motivator and I was afraid I listened very carefully and
took notes the lessons he taught that day lit a flame of Hope within me for
the first time I believed that there might be more to life than the seemingly
endless financial desperation that had been my family’s lot I thought about his
words constantly and began living that
principles he shared I immediately saw a difference in my life and that made my
belief burn still brighter by the age of 16 I’d become somewhat financially
independent I bought my own clothes and my own car and paid for my own
entertainment by 18 I’d saved up enough to finance college and a church mission
by the age of 26 I had saved enough to put 25% down on a house on a beautiful
tree-lined Street by the age of 31 I had paid off my home less than 20 years from
the time my millionaire friend gave that talk I returned to him with several
million dollars I wanted his help in investing he smiled when he saw me I
understand that you’ve done all right for yourself I have you to thank I said
you taught me what it takes to succeed financially you have yourself to thank
you replied then a smile turn to a look of concern I’m afraid you were the only
one who listened to me that day maybe I was just the only one who thought he had
to why is it that wealth seem so distant for most people a while back my 10 year
old daughter asked my wife Carrie if she had ever seen a millionaire Carrie
smiling said as a matter of fact I saw one this morning really my daughter
asked was he wearing a crown no was he in that limousine no he was just walking
my daughter thought about it for a moment then said were people dancing
around him saying go millionaire go millionaire millionaires are not as
removed as you might think there are more than three and a half million of
them in the United States alone in fact even without a college degree the
average American will earn more than a million dollars in his or her lifetime
so will you someday be a millionaire according to financial trends it’s not
likely recent statistics given by the Federal Reserve indicate that household
debt is at a record high relative to disposable income in 1946 household debt
was 22 percent of personal disposable income today it’s more than a hundred
and thirty percent and what about savings it’s hard to
believe that at one time this country had an average savings rate above 26
percent from 1948 to 1992 we average 7 percent to 11 percent by the end of 2007
the u.s. savings rate became nearly non-existent at an appalling 0.4 percent
the lowest rate since the Great Depression not surprisingly personal
bankruptcies in America have more than doubled in the past decade in fact far
more americans declare bankruptcy each year than graduated from college
what about retirement if we take 100 Americans and follow their financial
path to age 65 fewer than 4 will have an income above $35,000 while five times
that number will live below the poverty line more than 50 percent will be wholly
dependent on relatives Social Security and welfare now consider how women fare
in retirement first they’re mostly alone between the ages of 75 and 80 for only a
third of women are married with the spouse present by the age of 85 that
number drops to just 13% women on the average live longer than men and eat
more money saved for retirement but they don’t have it in 2004 the median income
for retired women was only twelve thousand eighty dollars compared with
men’s twenty-one thousand twenty dollars if Americans individual financial
prospects seemed so dire than who and where are these millions of millionaires
what is it that makes these people wealthy and others not is it luck it’s
disturbing to me that a recent poll revealed that a large number of
Americans think the best way to become wealthy is by winning the lottery let me
put this in perspective the National Safety Council accident tables show that
in a single year you’re thirty times more likely to be killed by lightning
than win the lottery you’re also more likely to die by poison a rattlesnake
bite legal execution or to be struck dead by a car well
is far more than just luck only 2% of today’s millionaires inherited all or
any part of their homes or property fewer than 20% inherited even a small
portion of their wealth in those lottery winners don’t often retain their prices
one study showed that of those who came into fortunes through lotteries more
than 80 percent were bankrupt within five years I was speaking in Cincinnati
when a woman in the audience raised her hand I know exactly what you mean she
said I had the best job in the world I was the nanny for the winner of the
Florida Lottery it was amazing we traveled aided the best restaurants and
amazing parties and that buy a new car every month it was great while it lasted
today they’re bankrupt and live in a mobile home to flee their creditors this
story’s ending is the norm not the exception the fate of those receiving
other windfalls such as insurance claims legal settlements and inheritance isn’t
much better then is it intelligence well if wealth were simply a matter of
intelligence a disproportionate number of millionaires would have stellar IQs
and academic merit badges but this isn’t the case most of today’s millionaires
did not graduate with high honors most of them did not even qualify for a
top-rated College in light of this it’s not surprising that Warren Buffett the
self-made multi billionaire investor was rejected by Harvard Business School in
fact research shows that millionaires average grade point average is lower
than a B on the other hand highly academic well-educated people often act
like complete fools when it comes to personal finances it’s common knowledge
among financial consultants that America’s most educated citizens doctors
and lawyers are notoriously bad at the handling their money then what is it if
it’s not luck or superior intelligence that makes a millionaire then what is a
common denominator besides money of course that the wealthy half and the
rest of humanity does not it’s simply this
the wealthy understand the principles of accumulating wealth and live them some
wealthy people learned the principles of accumulating riches through trial and
error some like myself learned from mentors or parents and for some it just
came naturally but whatever this knowledge is source I do not know a
single self-made millionaire who does not understand and apply the five
principles my millionaire friend taught us that day this is good news for
everyone else because it means that wealth is less a matter of circumstance
than a matter of knowledge and choice your knowledge of the five lessons means
that you can choose to live the life you desire so ultimately it comes back to
you do you want to be wealthy if so let’s get started lesson one decide to
be wealthy these are the words of Betty Lahan Harrigan women have been so
brainwashed by the destructive female culture that taught them to associate
money with sin evil and everything crude that it would take an entire book to
disentangle the subconscious fears and incredible fantasies that the simple
noun money Vokes in most women I’ve seen it far too many times to deny the
collective discomfort that falls over a crowd of women when I tell them to
decide to be wealthy this shouldn’t surprise me the feelings women hold
about money are remarkably complex and sometimes not even understood by the
women who hold them traditionally men and women have had different
relationships with money while women usually labor under society’s crushing
expectations of physical appearance men’s feelings of self-worth are more
likely tied to their bank accounts men are not only encouraged to pursue wealth
but pressure to do so women are usually taught the opposite this lack of female
emphasis on money combined with complex and often contradictory beliefs about
wealth leads to a general paralysis on the financial front and those who fail
to act fell as low as Franco wrote if you’re like
most women you don’t think rich and if you don’t think rich you certainly don’t
consciously engage in behaviors that will contribute to getting rich even
today women are still more likely than men to be taught that their roles have
less to do with money than with relationships I for one applaud this
teaching for men as well as women life isn’t about money
life is about God it’s about love it’s about family and relationships it’s
about personal evolution learning and growth and anyone who tells you
otherwise is probably trying to sell you something I can’t think of any more sure
method of creating an unhappy and unfulfilled life than to devote it to
the primary pursuit of money however the pursuit of financial power
to secure and enhance life’s true needs is not only appropriate but wise for
those who do not accept responsibility for financial matters life is thrown out
of balance as a dentist friend once told me those who don’t think about their
teeth are those who later in life spend the most time thinking about them it’s
no different with money it’s not surprising then that the people I know
who are the most obsessed with money are not the millionaire’s or even the
billionaire’s rather they are oftentimes the ones who are living paycheck to
paycheck to the financially enslaved life becomes all about money it’s not in
order to be truly happy we must live balanced lives to be in great fiscal
health is very much like being in great physical health it allows you to do more
and be more and it permits you to live your life free of constant pain and
bondage let me share with you a fable a woman who was looking for a place to eat
when she spotted a sign outside a restaurant all-you-can-eat special $1
she decided to give the restaurant a try what’s inside she found another sign
that read see yourself the woman found a small table in the crowded corner of the
restaurant and sat down soon a waitress greeted her what can I get
you I’ll have this special is special yes the woman replied looking around
what everyone else is having the waitress handed the woman a plate help
yourself there was a long line at the buffet
table and when the woman finally got to the food she was disappointed by what
she saw most of the bins were empty or appeared
to have been well picked over what was left didn’t look very appetizing no
wonder it’s only a dollar she thought she took what looked
palatable and then went back to her table dissatisfied with her mill when
she had finished eating she went to the checkout counter to pay as she pulled
out her wallet she noticed another room in the restaurant it was much nicer than
where she had dined and there were fewer people there were chandeliers and
beautiful carpets the tables were covered with clean white cloths and set
with china and silverware they were long buffet tables laden with food shellfish
and roasts colorful vegetables and large platters of cakes chocolate truffles and
desserts of all kinds a chef stood at one end slicing great slabs of roast
beef with a carving knife as she paid for her meal the woman asked the
waitress how much is that buffet $1 the waitress replied $1 she nodded
everything here is the same price what how come you didn’t tell me about that
room the waitress looked at her with a perplexed expression you said you wanted
what everyone else was having this little fable demonstrates precisely how
most people live their lives why wouldn’t you decide to be wealthy money
is a powerful ally with money I’ve been able to provide life’s necessities for
my family and loved ones food and comfortable shelter as well as superior
education and medical care I have a child with special medical needs a few
summers ago our out-of-pocket medical expenses totaled more than $50,000 at
that difficult difficult time I was grateful to be able to care for my child
without worrying about the money I think the best exam
full of the power of money comes from an experience with my mother a few years
back and went to visit my mother only to find her quite upset what’s wrong I
asked we can’t keep up with the bill she said we’re going to lose our home you’re
not going to lose your home I replied how can you say that we’ve lost three
homes before this was true you didn’t have a millionaire’s son back then I
said I’ll pay off your home right now who hold your mortgage isn’t this a cool
thing to be able to say to your mother no my mother replied we’re going to lose
it it took me a moment to understand my mother’s response then I realized that
her previous experiences of losing homes had been so traumatic that her fear now
outweighed reason so I dropped this subject and took my mom out to get some
pie on the way home we stopped at a bank and opened a special checking account it
was special for two reasons first it never emptied I put $20,000 into the
account and asked my mother to call me when it was getting low and I’d fill it
up again second no one could get into the account except my mother it was
important to her that no one else could threaten her security
a week later one of my brothers asked if I had seen mom recently sure I said we
had pie last week she looks younger he said I think they’ve changed her
medications I lost my mother several years ago the evening of her funeral my
father came to me and handed me her checkbook this is yours he said I think
there’s still money in it as I looked inside the checkbook I found in her own
handwriting a list of my mother’s simple pleasures book stores craft shops her
hairstylist small things my mother loved I couldn’t have known that my mother
would die so young how grateful I was to be able to provide her with some joy in
her last days with money my wife and I have been able to build Christmas box
house emergency shelters to help abused and neglected children since we began
our shelters have served more than 20,000 children wealth has brought
freedom of choice and opportunity you can’t tell me that
is evil but I can prove to you that the lack of money is financial distress is
evil the American Bar Association has estimated that nearly 90% of all
divorces over the past decade can be traced to quarrels and accusations over
money debt and poverty contributed to other serious social issues as well
studies by the Child Welfare League of America have demonstrated a direct
correlation between financial problems and domestic abuse and there’s more bad
news for the fiscally challenged numerous studies have shown a direct
correlation between debt and health problems one study published in the
Journal of law medicine and ethics found that nearly half the debtors reported
that debt troubles had affected their health appears back the president of the
American Medical Association told me about some interesting research if you
take two people he said with the same physical ailment and put them in the
same hospital room using the same doctor the same medication and the same
treatment the one with debt is twice as likely to die debt creates hopelessness
and without hope we lose the will to live one of the most perplexing
responses I hear from women explaining why they haven’t developed wealth is
that they feel undeserving of it I’ve heard this many times I don’t feel
worthy to be wealthy what does worthiness have to do with being wealthy
would you say I don’t feel worthy to be healthy of course not that would be
silly men don’t generally have this problem not because they have higher
self-esteem than women but because they have never been taught that money is
something you have to be worthy of unfortunately the opposite is more true
many men feel that if they don’t have a high net worth
they aren’t worthy the truth is neither attitude is correct or empowering the
bottom line is this money is power and power in the hands of good people is a
very good thing in the end each person’s definition of wealth is personal for me
when a person no longer has two think about money then they are truly
wealthy the good news is that for the most part the decision whether or not to
become wealthy is ultimately yours as my millionaire mentor said you can either
become part of the problem or part of the solution my life changed the day he
taught me this principle because that was the day I decided to be wealthy
extravagant does not equal wealthy before you can make the decision to be
wealthy you must have a concept of what being wealthy looks like understanding
wealth begins by discarding the distorted median gendered notions you
may have acquired concerning what it means to be rich America’s wealthy are
too often stereotyped is having gaudy extravagant lifestyles and irresponsible
fiscal habits the media perpetuates this caricature by focusing on the small
percentage of wealthy individuals who live such lives lifestyles of the rich
and stupid while such people do exist they are the exception not the rule
to groundbreaking books have done much to shed light on the reality of
America’s millionaires The Millionaire Next Door by Thomas J Stanley PhD and
William D Denko PhD and Stanley’s the millionaire mind revealed that today’s
millionaires are remarkably frugal with their money in fact in many cases even
their own children do not know of their wealth living lives of excess exorbitant
sand waste are countered to the message of this book and as I’ll demonstrate
later such overindulgence is usually short-lived most people you see trying
to look wealthy are part of the look rich quick crowd an expensive car
clothing does not make when wealthy in fact the opposite is more likely true
the path I’m recommending teaches individuals how to achieve a real and
enduring affluent lifestyle based on spiritual and life centered values
there’s tremendous power to commitment as simple as the first lesson seems in
my experience it’s the primary reason that most women fail to achieve wealth
they simply never decide to be wealthy they may hope or wish it to be so but
they never really choose it the simple truth is if you never choose to be
wealthy you will never attain wealth and even if you do beat all odds and win the
lottery your wealth will likely be short-lived
choice is the beginning of all journeys and as with all four steps it’s the most
important step of all as an employee in Hill wrote in his classic book Think and
Grow Rich riches begin with a state of mind with definiteness of purpose with
little or no hard work there is something very powerful about commitment
commitment to a plan or thought carries with it a remarkable force that
influences the unconscious mind and brings about the desired effect in other
words once we decide to have something the mind unconsciously begins to create
the reality necessary to bring to pass the very thing we desire the opposite is
true as well if we believe that we can’t do something we can’t if we think we
will fell we probably will in recent years there’s been a lot of talk about
the law of attraction I don’t disagree with this principle I’ve always believed
that the power of desire has great spiritual implications as the Bible says
ask and you shall receive about 20 years ago I had the desire to travel to China
I didn’t have sufficient funds at the time to justify such an expensive trip
but I wrote my desire down on a list of goals for the year four months later a
friend called me out of the blue she had just won an all-expenses-paid trip to
China for two her husband didn’t really want to go so she asked if my wife and I
would like to take the trip instead of course you could call that a coincidence
but the odds of something like that happening would suggest otherwise to
choose the path is to choose the destination there’s a Chinese saying the
journey of 10,000 miles begins with one step it’s within your power right now to
take the first step to wealth just one small step decide to be wealthy declare
your intention by saying it out loud then write on a card today
to be wealthy now put that card in your nightstand or next to your toothbrush
read those words every morning when you get up and every evening when you go to
bed keep a copy of it in your wallet next to your credit card do this for the
next thirty days well I might seem a little peculiar writing down your
intention do it anyway psychologists have proven that the simple act of
writing down an intention even if you don’t fully believe it can yield
powerful psychological results and remember the acquisition of money is
above all a psychological process now congratulate yourself you have just
taken your first step on a remarkable journey
a wise five lessons disciple told me that she had written today I decide to
be wealthy on more than a dozen cards and taped them all over her house what
should I do she asked my husband keeps teasing me about the cards did he ask
you to take them down I asked heavens no he loves the idea he
just likes to tease me lesson two take responsibility for your money
rose an intelligent educated woman grew up in a home where money wasn’t
discussed her father provided a good income for the family and rose and her
siblings just assumed that money grew on trees shortly after she was engaged to
be married she was surprised when her fiance wanted to talk about finances
that’s when a rose showed him her magic bill drawer instead of paying bills she
simply took the unopened envelopes and dropped them into a drawer where she
hoped they would just magically disappear far too many women are like
Rose well research suggests that more women than men are controlling the purse
strings too many women are still in the haze when it comes to their complete
financial outlook and if you don’t control your money your money will
control you taking control of your money begins with taking responsibility for it
that means knowing four things how much you have where it’s coming from where
it’s going and what it’s doing to make you rich
taking responsibility for your money also means not completely turning it
over to a bookkeeper or spouse it’s a matter of personal stewardship
it’s like parenting you can’t leave the responsibility of your children to
someone else and just hope that they’ll turn out alright of course it’s not just
women who fall prey to fiscal irresponsibility men are equally
fallible a high-income friend of mine finding his bank account depleted after
burning through tens of thousands of dollars said to me we have nothing to
show for it all I can figure is that we spent all
our money on happy Mills happy Mills I repeated yeah the only thing different
in our lives is a giant tub of Happy Meal toys unfortunately most women’s
closets are more organized than their finances if you’re one of the fiscally
irresponsible it’s time for change taking control of your money begins with
taking responsibility for it you’re good at taking responsibility for so many
other things in your life money should be one of them
this is a new beginning a new life no matter how irresponsible you’ve been in
the past or still are it’s never too late to take control here are four steps
to assist you in taking responsibility for your money 1 know how much money you
have how much are you really worth I was standing before a thousand women
when I asked how many of them could tell me within a few thousand dollars their
current net worth to my dismay only three in the audience raised their hands
I can’t overly stress the importance of a woman fully understanding her net
worth remember the statistic I shared at the beginning of this book more than 80%
of all women will be financially dependent upon themselves sometime
during their lives with odds like that knowing your financial situation isn’t
just smart it’s vital a woman said to me I can’t ask my husband where the money
goes or he’ll think I don’t trust him unfortunately she’s not alone in her
plight a recent study showed that a large percentage of marital fights about
money focus on financial control we all know
that women and men see things differently
a study showed that a man who doesn’t share financial information is usually
seen by women as controlling and power-hungry the same man may just see
women as untrusting recognizing the reality of these contrasting viewpoints
can help you achieve your goal without causing hurt feelings and conflict point
out to your spouse that knowing your financial situation is not only in the
greater good of your relationship and your family but also vital for
self-preservation nearly every time we speak on the five lessons I hear the
same heartbreaking story from some woman who is financially in the dark when her
spouse died or divorced her only then does she learn of their dire financial
situation one young widow told me that her now deceased husband had run of
debts of more than $200,000 that she didn’t know about now she needed to
somehow repay that money or taking care of her children all on her own
perhaps a conversation along these lines may be beneficial Jill thank you for
doing so much to make sure our family is financially taken care of I don’t know
what we’d do without you but I do worry about what we would do is something
happened to you jack feeling both praised and important Oh nothing’s going
to happen to me honey Jill I sure hope not of course no one
knows what will happen in the future but I do know that you would never want to
leave our family survival to chance a woman I met on a flight told me that she
believes men are meant to be the head of the household and that means she should
trust financial affairs to her husband even if this is your belief being
informed does not mean you are not trusting nor that you are taking control
it means that you are doing your share to protect your family and yourself I
can’t imagine that any caring man in this world would deny this necessity to
his partner you would be very concerned if you had a business partner who
refused to show you the company books this is no different in a marital
partnership as unromantic as it sounds you are business partners unfortunately
a spouse who is excessively reticent in sharing
financial information maybe hiding something debt gambling addictions or
other vices if this is the case the sooner you know the truth the sooner you
can help him and protect yourself remember
even if he creates the debt you are still responsible for it on the brighter
side couples who work together on accumulating wealth usually enhance
other areas of their marriage as they develop greater trust in each other then
that worth form that you’ll find on our website the five lessons.com will help
you calculate your current net worth and will give you a starting point for your
wealth accumulation think of it as stepping on a scale at the beginning of
a weight-loss plan at the end of each month complete the report again to chart
your progress then at the end of each year fill out an annual report this will
give you the most accurate view of your accumulating wealth as your wealth grows
you’ll find yourself looking forward to completing the forms to know where your
money comes from every paycheck bonus interest payment alimony check child
support payment royalty dividend gift and tip you receive should be recorded
on a ledger as income this will also help you understand your real income I
met a woman who wanted to be a stay-at-home mother who made the
difficult decision to go to work to supplement an inadequate household
income only to find that they were worse off than before she fell to take into
account that added taxes a higher tax bracket childcare and other incidental
expenditures such as transportation to her job a new wardrobe and eating out
knowing where your money comes from means an accurate portrayal of real
income and the cost of that income knowing where your money comes from will
also help you decide how your money should be used ongoing income such as
your monthly salary and alimony or child support payments should cover ongoing
expenditures one-time money such as a bonus or inheritance should be used to
pay for one-time expenditures such as a vacation or an education fund or for
paying off debt 3 know where your money going well it’s useful and important to
know where your money comes from understanding exactly where you are
spending your money is the only way to gain control of it
you can’t plug the holes in your boat if you don’t know where they are you might
have noticed even been surprised that I rarely use the word budget in this book
there’s a reason for this whenever you focus on deprivation you trigger the
powerful want instinct this is not to say that you should never deprive
yourself of something the same is true for budgeting when you try to force
yourself to do something you don’t want to do you battle your greatest opponent
yourself the best way to handle your excessive spending is to either lose the
desire to spend or to find something you want more like wealth freedom and
security the first step in controlling your spending is to identify your
spending I recommend the use of a checkbook in a
simple computer program such as quicken but technology is not necessary for the
first 20 years of my financial life I kept track of my money in an inexpensive
ledger I purchased at an office supply store on our website at the 5 lessons
calm you’ll find a cash flow form this form will help you categorize all your
incomes and expenses you’ll notice that the first line under expenditures is for
documenting how much you are paying yourself in the next chapter lesson 3
you’ll learn to always keep a portion of everything you earn the second
expenditure on the form is for charitable donations lesson 5 addresses
this important item the rest of your expense categories will depend on your
chosen lifestyle each expenditure on your cash flow form represents an
opportunity for reduction as you track your money you’ll discover that most
things cost more than you think for instance say you want to buy a
larger home if you’re like most people you’ll just look at how much extra your
mortgage payment is per month but the increased mortgage is just the beginning
there are moving costs realtor commissions and loan fees there are
extra property taxes insurance utilities on go
keep and a thousand little extras from light bulbs to furnace filters if you
have hired help a larger home will cost more if the home has a bigger yard there
are also extra costs and landscaping extra water sprinkler repair extra gas
for the lawnmower you get the idea when you add up the real cost what seemed
like an acceptable increase suddenly doesn’t look so attractive learning
where your money is going is the most important step toward gaining control of
your finances it is also an important way to gain control of your life in the
same way that knowing your net worth gives you control so does tracking your
money for know what your money is doing the world’s wealthiest individuals and
families make money by managing their money the point of amassing wealth is to
make money work for you instead of against you eventually as you stay true
to yourself and the five lessons your money will earn more each year than your
salary money will become your servant instead of the other way around if you
had an employee who sat around and did nothing you would quickly fire her
ongoing monthly evaluation of your investments is vital to your financial
success as you fill out your monthly net worth form you will see clearly just how
hard your money is working for you knowing exactly where you should put
your money to make it work for you is a more complex matter and is addressed
more fully in the next lesson one objection I often hear is I don’t have
time for this saying that you don’t have time to watch your money it’s like
saying that you don’t have time to watch the traffic signals as you drive you
don’t have time not to you spend thousands of hours each year earning why
wouldn’t you take a few hours a month to track where it goes lesson 3 keep a portion of everything
you earn we’ve all read stories about celebrities declaring bankruptcy or
whining about their financial woes from rockstars pawning the Grammys in order
to pay delinquent tax bills to former professional boxers waiting on tables
list of financial casualties grows annually when I hear these stories that
questions I ask myself far why didn’t they just put some of what they had
someplace safe why didn’t they save the proceeds from
just one album or in the case of the boxer just one title fight if they had
they’d still be wealthy of course celebrities aren’t the only
ones making bad financial choices a financial advisor told me the tragic
story of a client who had been seriously injured at work losing a limb in an
on-the-job accident in compensation he’d received a three million dollar
insurance settlement enough if properly handled to enable him to support his
family indefinitely at a salary five hundred percent higher than what they
were earning before the accident almost immediately after my friend
created a financial plan for this couple they began to change seduced by their
sudden riches they began taking a little here and there buying things recklessly
loaning money to family and friends launching unwise business ventures the
list of expenses grew as her account diminished at a subsequent meeting with
this couple my friend noticed that the woman was
wearing the largest diamond he had ever seen she deserves it her husband said
after all she’s been through with my accident in spite of my friends ongoing
counsel encouragement week after week to couple withdrew funds until less than
three years later they were completely broke and were both out looking for work
the reason they and others in similar situations fell is because they do not
understand the principles of wealth especially the third lesson a portion of
all you earn is yours to keep but all I earn is mine to keep I often
hear well if that’s true then why do you have so little of it left the truth is
that you give your money to everyone but yourself you’ve heard it said before and
it’s true it’s not what you earn it’s what you keep that makes you rich the
wealthy woman pays herself first pay yourself first is a popular modern
fine catchphrase but it has actually been
around for decades back in the 20s George s claisen wrote I found the road
to wealth when I decided that a part of all I earned was mine to keep how much
should you pay yourself that depends a good deal as a Cheshire cat said Alice
on where you want to get to and how fast you want to get there obviously the more
you put away the faster you’ll achieve your goals research shows that most
American millionaires save between 15 and 20 percent of their incomes I
recommend that you push yourself as hard as possible at first just to test your
limits then when you ease back you’ll find your comfort zone however the
amount you save should be a minimum of ten percent of your ongoing salary and
75 to 100 percent of your side earnings here’s some good news for women most
research shows that women value savings more than men one study by alliance
showed that women preferred financial security 15 times more than financial
status that doesn’t mean they always save and
many don’t but it does give women a psychological advantage one reader told
me how her mother would stash away money in her stocking drawer it got us through
some tough time she recalled another woman told me that for years she had
worked for a charity earning only a small wage unbeknownst to her husband
she had put away all of her earnings into a savings account when her husband
lost his job they used her savings to live on until he found another job her
advice to women every woman should have her own secret savings account the power
of compound interest Albert Einstein is believed have called compound interest
the greatest mathematical discovery of all time too many women either do not
realize the power of compounding interest or simply do not take advantage
of it in 2007 the median American household income was fifty thousand two
hundred and thirty three dollars a year if MS average allocates ten or fifteen
or twenty percent of her income to her nest egg
and earns an average interest rate of 10.2 percent
she will accumulate wealth of the following rates at the end of the first
year at 10% she will have five thousand three hundred and nine dollars but if
she saves 20 percent she’ll have ten thousand 46 dollars by her tenth year at
ten percent she’ll have eighty-seven thousand four hundred and seventy
dollars but if she’s saving 20 percent she’ll have a hundred and seventy four
thousand nine hundred and forty-one dollars and here’s where it gets really
fun after saving 10 percent for 40 years she’ll have more than 2.8 million
dollars but if she has saved 20 percent she’ll have nearly 5.7 million dollars
and it gets even better lesson four describes a method that allows you to
more than double your monthly contributions initially putting ten
percent of your income into your nest egg may require some faith but it’s
worth the leap over and over I’ve heard those who try say we’ve never missed
what we put away where did the extra money come from this is my theory is
tomato most people are wasting between 10 to 20 percent of their income that is
that much of their income disappears without a trace this being the case I
tell them the good news about their dilemma they can easily save and invest
that much of their income and not notice any negative change in their current
lifestyle in fact as my niece Heather noted most of those I’ve helped have
actually experienced an improvement in their standard of living as they adhere
to the five lessons and put money away they find themselves managing the
remaining percentage of their income much better than before it’s important
now that you start your nest egg remember becoming wealthy is as much a
psychological and emotional exercise as a physical one anyone who has ever
dieted knows that it’s easier to stick to a diet when you see immediate
progress in the mirror and on the scale likewise the most powerful way to
encourage new wealth accumulating behavior is to see visible
tangible results I found that the best way to do that is to create tangible
wealth to have something you can watch grow in fiscal terms this is called a
nest egg a sum of money put aside for future expenses personally I prefer the
dictionary’s older original definition of a nest egg a real or artificial egg
that is put in a hands nest to encourage it to continue lain after the other eggs
have been removed this definition alludes to a powerful psychological need
for anyone attempting to accumulate wealth the provision of incentives in
order to spur further productivity I cannot overstate the importance of
creating an abiding mental concept of your nest egg when I was 14 years old I
decided to start building my wealth by collecting precious metals I couldn’t
afford gold coins but silver was selling for around $3 an ounce about two hours
of work and my part-time job I took one of my mom’s canning jars and began
filling it with one ounce silver rounds this method of wealth accumulation had
several advantages first the fact that the rounds were not actual currency
lessened my temptation and my ability to spend them second I could actually see
myself growing richer as a poor boy I found it satisfying to watch my wealth
increase and as nothing fuels success like success the desire to watch the
pile of silver grow helped motivate me to save more the coins multiplied
quickly and soon I had filled several jars then I filled an entire wooden
chest with silver I felt like a pirate with a treasure chest by the age of 18 I
had saved thousands of dollars as my niece Heather collected precious metals
she discovered two additional advantages first perspective she began to weigh the
cost of an item against the price of silver for example she’d reason I could
take my family out for dinner or I could make dinner and buy four more pieces of
silver second purchasing the silver round
satisfied Heather’s urge to spend like so many others she had discovered that
she was a Shopaholic spending her money on silver was like
eating her cake and having it to really precious metals does it need to be
precious metals well of course not collecting silver coins worked for me
because to me they felt like wealth and that helped me to succeed a few years
back I was dropping my son off at preschool what his teacher stopped me
mr. Evans she said I don’t mean to delay you
but I just wanted to thank you I read your money book a few months back and
now I’m out of debt for the first time in my life
congratulations I said tell me about your nest egg she looked at me
quizzically how did you know it started a nest egg because the five lessons
don’t work if you don’t start when I replied she hesitated
I didn’t collect gold or silver she said a little embarrassed I didn’t know how
to sew I just filled jars with dollar coins I’ve got these jars all around my
house now of course putting money in jars isn’t considered a good financial
investment but psychologically it was a great one I ran into the same woman a
year later how’s it going I asked she stuck to thumbs up never been richer a
common question I get is how do i purchase precious metals well as with
all investments there are pros and cons to purchasing precious metals starting
your nest day with precious metals is good for emotional and security reasons
but in the long run it’s not likely to pay out the interest you need for steady
financial growth in the past 50 years the average annual return on precious
metals has been around 4.5 percent less than half the rate of return of the S&P
500 however as we’ve witnessed lately in times of economic crisis precious metals
act as a buffer against loss for this reason I recommend starting your nest
egg with some metals then after you’ve established your nest egg and list the
help of a professional financial adviser and expand to other forms of investments
if you’re on a limited income I recommend purchasing silver I began
with 0.999 pure one ounce silver rounds as opposed to coins or bullion you’ll
pay a bit more four rounds but they offer a better
guarantee of authenticity and you’ll recover the extra money paid when you
sell be careful not to buy special collectors coins unless that’s your
intention and you’re sufficiently knowledgeable as they likewise carry a
special premium which may not be recoverable when it comes time to sell
the same is true if you’re purchasing gold for gold point nine nine nine pure
one ounce coins as well as other weights are minted in the form of Canadian Maple
Leafs American Eagles Chinese pandas and South African Krugerrand
even though they all contain one ounce of gold there is usually a slight
difference in the cost these gold coins are quite beautiful and they’re smaller
coins make lovely pendants both silver and gold are available at coin shops and
precious metal dealers be sure to shop around before you purchase as dealers
update their prices at different times of the day you can track hourly precious
metal prices at the five lessons website at the five lessons dot-com remember to
seek professional assistance ultimately how and where you keep your nest egg is
a decision you should base on your own current financial needs and the
availability of trustworthy financial counsel as your investment builds take
the time to learn more about investing and investment opportunities diversity
is important as your nest egg grows you may want to have a combination of
securities precious metals and real estate a 401 K with an employer’s match
can be a very powerful tool in building wealth above all avoid risky schemes and
investments no matter the supposed payoff just as
you would consult a doctor before making any serious decisions regarding your
health consult an established successful investment counselor before you make any
major investment decision as your nest egg grows you’ll begin to fill the power
that comes from having wealth and you’ll notice things that are within your
financial grasp but that were not available to you before with this
newfound power you’ll be tempted to dip into the nest and still a few eggs
resist you are likely familiar with the fable the goose that laid the golden egg
in this story a poor country man discovers that one of his geese lays
golden eggs but only one a day at first he’s happy with his new riches but as
his wealth grows he becomes greedy and impatient finally he decides to cut the
goose open to get all the gold out at once of course in so doing he manages
only to kill the goose and gets no more eggs
a more modern frame of reference is that many woman’s money habits resemble an
eating disorder they saved their money only to suddenly purge it in a binge of
reckless spending bulimic behavior will doom your nest egg Georgia’s claisen
wrote appropriately about this habit full you eat your children remember the
primary purpose of developing your nest egg is not to spend it but to make it
earn more money for you just as the wealthy do with patience your nest egg
will earn more income than you can working full-time but only if you leave
it alone long enough to allow it to grow what about debt well here are the five
steps to freedom from debt first record all your debt on one sheet if possible
so you know exactly what you’re facing better the devil you know than the devil
you don’t write down the company or person you owe how will the debt is the
invoice number and the amount make sure you don’t miss a single debt as having
unaccounted debt pop up later is demoralizing second contact preferably
call everyone you owe money and ask if they will reduce your debt you’ll be
amazed at how much you can reduce using the seven golden words you’ll learn this
powerful technique in the next chapter a company I know of did this and knocked
out more than a third of their debt in just one week
they found that many of their creditors were willing to accept as little as 30
percent of the invoice if they would pay off the debt quickly this required them
to shuffle their payment priorities a bit you will probably be surprised at
how many of your creditors will be willing to work with you most companies
are so used to people trying to run on them that someone trying to honorably
pay her debts is a real treat third consolidate your remaining debt
with the lowest interest rate possible if you’re struggling with significant
debt you might want to consult with the CCC s a consumer credit counseling
service to create a debt repayment plan today many people carry the bulk of
their consumer debt on their high interest credit cards if this is you
take the time to transfer your debt to a loan with the more reasonable interest
rate fourth pay down your debt a question I often get is should I pay off
my debt before I start building my nest egg the answer is it depends in most
cases I recommend using 10% of your funds for debt repayment and 10% for
your wealth accumulation even if you’re losing a few percentage points in
interest I call this the 10:10 payoff the reason for this is strictly
psychological it’s important emotionally for you to see the growth of your wealth
if you’re not seeing your wealth increase you’ll be less motivated and
ultimately less likely to succeed I can best explain this principle by sharing a
true story I once had a friend who weighed more than 350 pounds after years
of struggling with his weight he decided to do something about it once and for
all he put himself on a remarkably intense
and painful diet for 90 days all he could eat was his foul-smelling protein
goop 4 times a day he was miserable but he stuck to it after the first 30 days
he had lost close to 50 pounds although this was a tremendous success to him it
didn’t feel like one he still weighed more than 300 pounds no one outside
those of us close to him was congratulating him or telling him how
good he looked with all the pain he had endured and with no positive
reinforcement to inspire him he eventually quit I’ll never forget the
day he said to me come on Rick let’s go get some pizza whether you fall in
hundred feet or fifty feet deep in a well it’s still dark and cold if you’re
$100,000 in debt and managed through great sacrifice and hard work to pay off
$50,000 life doesn’t really seem all that different as you’re still deep in
debt however if you were to pay off $25,000 and had $25,000 in an investment
account earning interest you would feel different success fuels success lack of
success fuels nothing there are two other reasons for my philosophy first
I’ve noticed that people develop what I’ll call a debt metabolism this is how
one woman explained her debt metabolism it seems we’ve always had $50,000 of
debt no more no less then when my mother died
we were left an inheritance of a little more than $50,000 the first thing we did
was to pay off all our debt but within six months we were right back to $50,000
in debt if we had put the money aside or gradually paid off the debt I think we
could have changed our habits the second reason for simultaneously saving and
paying off your debt is that it will help train you for your new lifestyle
once your debt is paid off just apply the extra 10% to your nest egg to
accelerate your wealth accumulation when should you pay off your debt before
starting a nest egg when your interest rate is hopelessly high and you can’t
get it reduced but even in this case I would still start a nest egg with one
percent of my income just to create the habit and belief and fifth don’t create
any more debt this might be the time to cut up some credit cards in today’s
world is not necessarily realistic to not have a credit card but you can cut
down on the number of cards you have lower their limits or if you’re unable
to control yourself change to a debit card one of the worst things that could
happen after you have consolidated your debt is for you to create a new form of
debt if you suspect that you’re a compulsive or binge spender get hell
now lesson 4 win in the margins of all the lessons lesson 4 has the most to do
with the speed of my own financial success what does it mean to win in the
margins simply this the wealthy find additional ways to add to their growing
nest egg jay paul getty once named the richest man in the world by Fortune
magazine called this The Millionaire mentality the millionaire mentality
watches costs and tries to reduce them and strives to increase production and
cells and thus profits daddy didn’t write his 1965 book how to be rich for
us little people he wrote his book for other business magnates lucky for us we
can still get a glimpse inside a billionaire’s mind and learned some of
his tricks there are essentially two ways to win in the margins the first is
by earning extra income the second is by keeping more of what you earn I
recommend that you do both first let’s explore winning in the margins with
extra income I once had a friend who had the peculiar habit of looking for money
he would actually walk or ride his bike while looking down as odd as his
behavior was the most surprising result of his habit was that nearly every day
he would find something we would be walking along when suddenly hit stop
bend over and lift a coin or bill from the ground now I’m not recommending that
you walk looking down that’s a little weird my point in sharing this story is
to demonstrate that you find what you are looking for when you start looking
for ways to increase your income you’ll discover that there are opportunities
all around you that you have never thought of or noticed following examples
illustrate this principle coffee cans of gold my wife’s grandfather Pietro de
cera emigrated from Italy to America when he was only 17
he came west looking for work and found employment in the gold and silver mines
west of the Salt Lake Valley he worked the night shift at the furnaces where
the process door was smelted in order to separate the gold from the other men
before being poured into bullion Pietro noticed that the molten gold would
occasionally pop splashing the metal on the hood of the furnace he told his
Foreman that he would stay after his shift and clean the hood on his own time
if he could keep the small metal flakes he found the foreman agreed at the end
of each shift Pietro would climb into the furnace and scrape the thin gold
flakes from the metal hood into an empty coffee can within months the poor
immigrant boy had filled two coffee cans to the brim with the precious metal
nearly twenty pounds of gold that’s nearly a quarter million dollars in
today’s money stamp and success Shelly Gardner loved being a
stay-at-home mom but yearned for a social and creative outlet and adding a
little income to the family budget wouldn’t hurt either so Shelly and her
husband took the money they were saving for a new home and started a rubber
stamp company called Stampin Up Shelly and her sister sold the stamps at home
workshops and signed up family and friends to be demonstrated to the
product which includes rubber stamps in a wide variety of accessories they
stored inventory in Shelly’s living room and filled orders while their children
napped that didn’t last long within months the living room was far too small
to handle the demand and Stampin Up moved to larger facilities twice in the
first year two decades later Shelly runs the International
multi-million dollar company which has an 80,000 square foot manufacturing
facility and that 300,000 square foot administration and distribution building
today Stampin Up operates in seven countries with more than 40,000
demonstrators and is helping other women to win in the margins with such
explosive growth Shelly works hard to ensure that her original focus isn’t
lost she believes that creativity whether
expressed in cards scrapbooking gifts or home decor can inspire others strengthen
relationships and make people happier it certainly has for her prom queen Kathy
Clifford was only 11 years old which began designing dresses with her
grandmother her passion for design carried on
College where she majored in clothing and textiles she met her husband they’re
married and eventually had five children Kathy enjoyed life as a stay-at-home
mother as she continued to design and make dresses for her three daughters as
her girls grew older their friends also started asking Kathy to make their prom
in pageant dresses she often found herself sewing through the night to meet
the demands of her unsolicited clients then came the unexpected Kathy’s husband
became seriously ill and was unable to work the challenge of providing for five
children suddenly fell on her though she had made money designing dresses she
couldn’t sew fast enough to make the kind of money she needed to provide for
her family so she began a researching how she could buy and market other
dresses one weekend she drove to Los Angeles and came home with 20 dresses
now when people call to order a dress Kathy explained that she couldn’t sew a
dress for them but asked if they would like to come over and see the beautiful
dresses she had purchased her dresses were a hit and she purchased more as her
home filled up with dresses it became time to open a store at that time banks
to in particularly favor making loans to women one bank manager told her that
should be out of business in less than a year but hearing no just increased her
determination another challenge for Kathy was travelling around the world as
a buyer without ever being taught how to do it but as Kathy says women can do
anything in the world that they want to do there will always be someone willing
to help them and when there isn’t someone there’s always a book today
business at Kathleen’s Bridal and formal wear is booming and you can find her
dresses advertised in 17 your prom and teen prom magazines Kathy’s dream has
come true she’s a successful dress designer with buying power and clout and
enjoys seeing her designs create magic on all the special days of a woman’s
life the box randy escobar in her husband Tony owned
a nutritional products company that sold products to health food stores and
pharmacies when the tragedy of 9/11 hit followed by the n3
scare they found it nearly impossible to import the materials they needed to
produce their products they were suddenly unable to fill orders and their
business collapsed during this difficult time they clung together as a family and
did what they could to get by Randy still remembers just how much water you
can add to milk before it doesn’t taste like milk anymore
Randy had been praying for something that would help her family recover from
financial ruin when a cardboard box arrived on her doorstep her first
thought she picked it up was whatever it is I hope there’s not a bill inside
because I don’t know how I could pay it inside the box was a health product from
Isagenix it had been sent from an old friend with a note that read please
follow the instructions use the product and share with others Randy followed the
instructions and had such wonderful results with the product that she signed
up as a distributor with the company and began sharing it with everyone she knew
within a few years Randy had not only rescued their family
business but with her husband as her partner went on to break network
marketing industry records and become a multimillionaire
today she is a global leader with the Isagenix company but what she is most
proud of is that 26 people in her team have also become millionaires and many
more soon will be a stupid idea as a child Debbie feels loved eating and
baking chocolate chip cookies she also enjoyed sharing her cookies with friends
and family while baking cookies might seem to be a simple thing it was
something debbie knew she was good at in her teens she began experimenting with
recipes and developing her own special recipe she was only 20 years old when
she had the idea to open a chocolate chip cookie store Debbie had married
young at the age of 19 and her husband told her the store was a stupid idea
her parents echoed the sentiment telling her that without a college degree
business experience or money she had no business going into the cookie business
others just told her she was crazy how could a business survive selling just
chocolate chip cookies but Debbie believed in her idea
and she wanted something more in her life it was about gaining control she
said so without support from her family she visited banks and investors after
being turned down again and again she finally got a bank to loan her twenty
five thousand dollars and in 1977 opened her first store in Palo Alto California
mrs. Fields chocolate chippy that humble store grew into a 500 million dollar
company with 650 retail bakeries in 11 different countries
Debbie became a business celebrity and inspired women entrepreneurs around the
globe she began franchising her stores in 1990
and sold the business to an investment group in the early 90s she has continued
to innovate and has since authored several New York Times best-selling
cookbooks debbie believes that the biggest failure in life is never trying
of course successful women’s businesses are not limited to stereotypical female
activities such as clothes design and cooking women can succeed in any realm
of financial endeavor in fact two of women entrepreneurs greatest success
stories are women in the petroleum business their company’s billion
annually in excess of 100 million dollars and 1 billion dollars one of the
traits they often find women guilty of is undervaluing their abilities and
talents while it’s common to find people with great talents who take their
abilities for granted women seem to be especially susceptible what I do is no
big deal they tell themselves anyone can do it
the truth is everyone can’t where would Debbie fils be if she had thought anyone
can bake a cookie we’re the same way about our ideas all too often we
discount them storing them in the bargain bins of our minds just because
they seem obvious or simple to us in doing so we forget that the most
brilliant of ideas are almost always simple in concept Ralph Waldo Emerson
said none of us will ever accomplish anything
excellent or commanding except when she listens to this whisper which is heard
by alone back when I was an advertising
executive our agency would focus test products to learn how to sell them or to
discover if they even were sellable we’d fill a room with women and then sit
behind a two-way mirror and listen in as they discussed our products benefits and
faults I’m sure if asked those women would
claim not to know anything about marketing but the truth is we were
relying on them to tell us how to market we valued and needed their input they
were teaching us bottom line believe in yourself your opinions and ideas are far
more valuable than you give them credit for Sodapop tuxedos and Christmas gifts
the most money I’ve made in my lifetime was on a side project it wasn’t my first
such venture it was my fourteenth for me the habit of winning in the margins
started when I was young at the age of 13 I was working for low wages cleaning
up construction sites such menial labor gave me ample time to think though most
of what I thought about was how I could quit cleaning construction sites
one afternoon I noticed that the welders who were paid well would leave the job
site every few hours and drive to a nearby convenience store for soda pop I
saw an opportunity that night on the way home from work I bought an inexpensive
cooler at a secondhand store then purchased soda pop and candy bars in
quantity from a nearby price Club the next day I took my cooler to work
selling my products at $1 each I doubled my income making as much on the treats
as I did pushing a broom I found another opportunity when I
worked at a formalwear shop one day my boss asked me to carry some boxes up
from the cellar when I had completed the task I asked him what was in the boxes
old suits he replied I can’t open a box and pulled out one of the suits he was
an old black tuxedo it was from the 60s and looked like one of the Beatles
tuxedos I asked him what he planned to do with the suits I’m just going to haul
them out to the landfill why don’t we sell them I asked
who would buy a 20 year old used tuxedo I would I said mad try selling them he
rolled his eyes sure just don’t let it interfere with your work and I’ll tell
you what you can keep half of what you bring in the sell of those suits brought
in more than 16 thousand dollars my biggest success came 10 years later when
I decided to self-publish a book I had written as a Christmas present for my
daughters I hadn’t intended to publish the book but after receiving many
requests for copies I decided to print a few the first year that little book
netted me $20,000 I reinvested my earnings in the second year I earned
more than $400,000 the third year I earned nearly four and a half million
dollars that’s when I quit my day job you could say that I and the others I’ve
written about here we’re just lucky of course we were but as George s claisen
wrote opportunity is a haughty goddess who wastes not her time with the
unprepared was it luck that caused me and my colleagues a try again and again
to find ways to succeed financially was it luck that I noticed a trend with my
book was it luck that I consulted all the experts I could find about making my
book a success was it luck that I took copious notes on each marketing venture
I tried evaluating the successes and failures the bottom line is this I would
never have been lucky had I not been looking for ways to increase my earning
ability for free ideas on how to win in the margins visit my website today at
winning in the margins calm and enter win when asked for your passkey double
your wealth while most of those in the previous examples hit it big even
earning just a percentage of your regular income each month goes a long
way toward building your wealth remember what I said about compound interest in
lesson 3 if you’re earning an average household income and are saving 10%
you’re putting away about and $18 a month if you increase your
income by an extra 418 dollars a month and apply it to your nest egg it is in
the long term accumulation of your wealth the equivalent of doubling your
income again your wealth accumulation at ten percent the first year is five
thousand three hundred and nine dollars and by year forty is 2.8 million dollars
but by contributing just an extra four hundred and eighteen dollars a month
directly to your nest egg your savings at the end of the first year are more
than ten thousand dollars and by the fortieth year are worth more than 5.6
million dollars by increasing your nest egg contribution through earning or
saving an additional ten percent each month the average household will achieve
millionaire status more than seven years earlier clearly the path of extra income
is worth pursuing but where do you find the extra income as demonstrated by my
friend who walked with his head down looking for money it’s all around you
from my experience your greatest success winning in the margins will likely come
through paying attention to your talents abilities and the unique opportunities
that already surround you I suggested earlier that there’s another way to
double your contribution to your nest egg that doesn’t include extra earnings
and that savings it’s the second way to win in the margins successful wealth
building women understand that the world is designed to take their money
never forget that billions of dollars have been spent to suggest to your mind
what will make you happy what you should look like what you should drive eat and
wear and ultimately how you should spend your money the collective power of those
suggestions is probably far stronger than you realize just look at a 20-year
old fashion magazine what were we thinking how is someone thinking for us
early in my advertising career I wrote a radio commercial for a local chain of
copy centers in his commercial I depicted
and talking about the copy centers new longer hours with a customer who showed
up at his store at five minutes past five o’clock needing exactly three
thousand copies by morning the radio spots ran into our surprise the managers
at each of the seven copy centers reported that they had had a rush of
people showing up at 5:05 p.m. needing exactly three thousand copies by morning
in the same way that the millionaire mentality recognizes that the world is
designed to take our money it also knows that the average American has been
psychologically conditioned to consume and spend market researchers and retail
anthropologists specifically study your shop and behavior to more efficiently
target you on the internet computers track your spending habits and
systematically parade offers in front of you politicians and bureaucrats
increased fees and taxes determine salespeople take courses to learn how to
get you to part with your money and it’s getting worse marketers are targeting
younger and younger consumers addicting them to a lifestyle of overconsumption
from 1980 to today advertising to children in America has increased more
than tenfold from a hundred million dollars a year to more than 1 billion
dollars successful wealth builders recognize the nature of the real world
and therefore carefully scrutinize every expenditure they learn to win in the
margins by keeping more of what they earn while most of today’s self-help
books about messages about thinking big J paul Getty argued in how to be rich
that the problem of financial failure is often attributable to the inability to
think small the millionaire mentality he wrote gives meticulous attention to even
the smallest details and misses no opportunities to reduce costs in his own
or his employers business we can change that too and misses no opportunity to
reduce costs in her own business and household this millionaire mentality can
be applied to all aspects of financial endeavor from business to
personal spending there are four key mindsets that characterized the
effective wealth builder one The Millionaire mentality carefully
considers each expenditure to the millionaire mentality believes that
freedom and power are better than momentary pleasure 3 The Millionaire
mentality does not equate spending with happiness and for the millionaire
mentality protects her nest egg I will examine each of these millionaire
mentalities in greater detail mindset 1 the millionaire mentality carefully
considers each expenditure there are three questions that the successful
wealth builder asks herself before she parts with her money
one is this expenditure really necessary – is this expenditure contributing to my
wealth or taking from it and three is this an impulse purchase or a planned
purchase let’s start with one is this expenditure really necessary or is it
possible to get the same personal effect without using money or using less of it
one of the best dressed women I know is a single mother living on a very limited
income how can you afford such a beautiful wardrobe I asked her she
smiled and said it was her secret later on she offered to tell me I only buy
used clothing high quality but pre-owned by some rich person I let them lose the
value same effect without the financial effect a few years ago I was in Venice
standing near the gondolas by Piazza San Marco I had lived in Italy for more than
a year and spoke enough Italian to be conversant the gondoliers however
assumed that I was just another American tourist so they didn’t worry about what
they said in front of me how much do I charge this group one of the gondoliers
asked 50 euro for Japanese 40 euro for Americans 20 euro for Italians how do
you determine what to charge I asked the man
in Italian embarrassed that I had understood him he finally answered
whatever they will pay more prices than you think are determined in this very
way and as such are usually far more negotiable than you think
this doesn’t mean you have to become a hardened Hagler simple soft voice
inquiry is often just as effective if not more so recently I was shopping for
some computer equipment at a local electronics dealer after the salesperson
had demonstrated the equipment and quoted a price I simply asked him if
they matched the lowest price available I hate buying something and the next day
finding it cheap or somewhere else I explained he thought about it then said
just a minute he pulled up a comparison site on the Internet
and we immediately found the same equipment available for a hundred and
forty dollars less there’s the price I said he not only sold it to me for the
lower price but he threw in a few other complimentary items as well many people
don’t get what they want out of life simply because they don’t ask the seven
golden words a salesmen friend of mine was trying to negotiate a deal with a
large client when he quoted his bid his clients forehead creased with concern is
that the best you can do he asked my friend began to squirm he
left the room and called his boss we’ve got to do better he said his boss gave
him a better price newly confident with his bid my friend sat back down with his
client we can go three percent less the man still looked concerned is that the
best you can do my friend more certain and he was about to lose the account
went back to the phone he again talked to his boss who conceded one more
percent discount afraid that it wasn’t going to be enough my friend threw an ax
portion of his own sales commission still the client didn’t seem impressed
is that really the best you can do my friend sighed
I’m sorry he said but it is the man smiled fine I’ll sign the order I was
just making sure that I really was your best offer
winning in the margins means pushing the limit to see just how low you can
purchase especially on the big-ticket items a financial consultant once said
to me it drives me crazy the way people compartmentalize their money they’ll
clip coupons to save 35 cents on a can of soup then throw thousands away on a
big purchase because they didn’t bother to compare prices or even ask if they
could get it for less just 7 simple words is that the best you can do of all
the advice in this book the seven golden words are most likely to provide you the
most immediate and surprising success a friend of mine who was in the middle of
building a home claimed have saved more than twenty five thousand dollars by
using the seven golden words and he added the subcontractors all thought
that he was especially smart and actually added free upgrades
I’ve had several readers report saving more than a thousand dollars within a
few hours of learning seven golden words in fact we hear these success stories
regularly not that this surprises me I have a large and growing collection of
my own the seven golden words work not always but enough of the time to make
them worth your while a new baby actually recently adopted a baby girl
besides the normal fees associated with the adoption agency and lawyers the
medical cost associated with the birth were well over twenty thousand dollars
having used the seven golden words before she decided to see if she could
lower this medical expense as well after reaching the hospital’s Accounts Payable
office actually first think the hospital representative for the care they had
given her baby and her baby’s birth mother she then quickly described the
event surrounding her baby’s birth and kindly asked if the outstanding balance
was the best they could do after a few minutes on hold the accounts payable
representative returned happily saying that the hospital is willing to reduce
the bill by 80% if she would pay the bill in full
within 30 days a savings of $16,000 a bedroom set Patricia had saved three
long years to purchase a bedroom set when she had finally saved enough she
went to the furniture store to pick it out she found the set of her dreams and
wanted to purchase it immediately but having read the five lessons decided to
sleep on her decision as soon as she got home she realized that she hadn’t used
the seven golden words she called the salesperson and asked him if the six
thousand dollar price tag was the best he could do no he replied I can give you
30% off it had worked so well she tried it again and asked if that was the best
he could do well he said let’s make it an even $2,000 off and I’ll pay the
sales tax and delivery using the seven golden words
Patricia saved more in five minutes than she had in a whole year ruby slippers
lisa was a little hesitant about using the seven golden words but eventually
decided to give them a try what did I have to lose she reasoned she found her
opportunity a few days later when her friend introduced her to a new shoe
store Lisa had already selected several pairs
when she came upon some expensive red patent leather pumps in spite of the
price she added them to her purchases Lisa had noticed that one of the other
customers in the store had used a $10 off coupon Lisa said to the sales clerk
I don’t have a coupon but can I still get the discount sure the woman said
Lisa thanked the woman after the sales clerk had rung up Lisa’s shoes Lisa
looked at the price and said is that the best you can do on this price the lady
looked at her for a moment then reached into a drawer and pulled out a special
coupon and scanned it the price changed there you are that’s an additional $80
off your purchase she said Lisa it was almost speechless but managed to think
the woman again when Lisa got home she captured her savings by putting the 80
dollars she had saved in her nest day as consumers we leave a lot more money
on the table than we realize a woman at one of my seminars was the day manager
at a national chain clothing store its corporate policy she told us that any of
our employees can discount up to 30 percent of any product at any time all a
customer needs to do is ask how long have you worked for that store I asked
about five years in all that time how many customers have asked for a discount
she thought about it for a moment they were applied maybe three to seven golden
words are one of my favorite tricks in this book I hear more success stories
from this technique than any other I personally have saved more than a
hundred thousand dollars using these words the seven golden words don’t
require haggling in fact the more softly and kindly you use them the better they
work that’s because this approach isn’t confrontational its cooperative a few
years back a man came up to me after one of my seminars those golden words of
yours don’t work he said bluntly really I asked you’ve tried them well not
exactly I got my own method tell me about it I said I looked them in the eye
and say it ain’t worth that and in 40 years it’s never worked hmm I said think
of it this way if I’m at a book signing and you come up to me pick up my book
look at the price and say it ain’t worth that you’ve just offended me in fact I
don’t want you to have my book however imagine the opposite approach you say
this book of yours is worth twice this amount
unfortunately I can’t even afford this price do you think that’s the best the
store can do what do you think I’m going to do if I don’t buy it for you myself
I’m definitely going to talk to a store manager to see if such a wise kind man
can get a much-deserved discount he nodded but didn’t get it to each his own
he said the seven golden words are engaging
they’re inviting people to be magnanimous and feel good about
themselves what I love most about the seven golden words is that they are
especially empowering for single mothers single mothers are constantly struggling
with the balance of working more to provide for their family’s needs or
spending more time with their children these women are heroes of mine if a
young single mother learns as one powerful technique saves $100 a month
using it and puts it away in her nest egg
she’ll retire with a fortune sure retirement may seem a lifetime away but
wasn’t a $25,000 or $100,000 cushion the bank changed the way she views life just
one thing in junior high school I had a wrestling coach who said Evans I don’t
care how many moves you know I just want you to be better at one of them than
anyone else in the state he told me a story about a wrestler who had practiced
a takedown move every day until no one could stop him he would take down his
opponent then just let him go and take him down again he won first place in
state every year why am I telling you the story if you can perfect just this
one move just seven simple words then remember to capture your savings you’ll
see remarkable success less is more as long as we’re asking the question is
this expenditure really necessary something should be said about
consumption Americans over consume at record and embarrassing levels the quest
to have more can be seen in our homes as well as our waste lines in 1950 the
average home was 1,100 square feet in 1970 it had increased to 1400 square
feet and by the year 2004 the average home was precisely 2348 square feet
despite the fact that families have gotten smaller as a nation we are
spending more and enjoying it less strangely more people surveyed in the
50s described themselves as rich than do today curtailing the pattern of
overconsumption is an important step not just in saving
but in freeing ourselves from our possessions psychologically in spite of
all we’ve been told or sold more is less and less is more
this is corroborated by a study that showed that eighty six percent of
Americans felt happier after having voluntarily cut back on consumption now
on to the second and third question the successful wealth builder asks herself
before she parts with her money – is this expenditure contributing to my
wealth or taking from it of course not all expenditures can be assets but
continually asking this question helps wealth builders redirect the use of
their money it’s no coincidence that the wealthy put their money in their homes
instead of their cars homes usually appreciate cars almost always depreciate
three is this an impulse purchase or a planned purchase am i being pressured to
make an expenditure I’m not certain about candy bars and magazines line the
checkout stands like thugs waiting to jump you as you pull out your wallet or
purse late night infomercials come at you when you’re tired and your
resistance is down the impulse buy is the mainstay of the American retail
establishment the layout of the grocery store testifies to this which is why the
essentials meat eggs and milk are always at the back of the store making you pass
aisle after aisle of possible impulse purchases and it works most grocery
stores estimate that more than 50% of purchases are impulse purchases you’ve
heard the adage never shop with an empty stomach this wisdom should be applied
whenever money is concerned never shop with an empty ego buy what you mean to
buy whether it’s for groceries or a new car save time and money by shopping with
a list going once going twice early in our marriage my wife and I made
a commitment never to make any large purchases on impulse if the salesperson
said he needed an answer right now and the answer was no in nearly 25 years we
haven’t once regretted walking away from a strong-arm sales pitch not once in
fact whenever we found ourselves being pressured by an aggressive salesperson
one who was insisting that we had to buy now or let a once-in-a-lifetime
opportunity pass it was very empowering to be able to say no the funny thing is
that despite all the threats that the opportunity would pass it never did not
once that I can remember but many times we passed often after a good night’s
sleep we decided that we really could live without an automatic sock stacker
after all again the five lessons are not about deprivation they’re about not
wasting money buy whatever you want if you have the money just make sure that
you really want it and will enjoy it for at least as long as you have to pay for
it capture your savings everything you’ve just learned about saving is only
half the process whenever you save money from using one of these techniques it’s
important that you capture those savings by moving the money saved into your nest
egg for instance a friend of mine was about to pay off a hospital bill and had
already written out the check for around $1,500 when he decided to try the seven
golden words the hospital apologetically told him that it could only discount the
bill by ten percent he was delighted of course heat warped the cheque he had
written and he wrote two more one for the revised hospital bill of $1,350 and
the second to his nest egg for the hundred and fifty dollars he had just
saved there’s another psychological benefit to this technique have you ever
trained an animal the very foundation of successful training is to reward desired
the same principle is true for humans you’re no animal but whenever you save
money then capture those savings you’re conditioning yourself for more success
the more you pay yourself and watch your nest egg grow the stronger your habit
will become remember if you’re able to save just a hundred dollars a month and
you faithfully transfer it to your nest egg in 40 years compounded at the
average S&P 500 rate of 10.2 percent that little extra savings will be worth
close to $700,000 mindset to the millionaire mentality believes that
freedom and power are better than momentary pleasure the sirens of credit
are luring you to the rocks of disaster they’re enticing song by now pay later
is indeed truth in advertising though was certainly not intended to be pay is
exactly what America is doing the price we pay to have it now is quite clear
broken marriages homes health and lives the successful wealth builder
understands the danger of debt and knows that the primary way to avoid it is by
delaying gratification a decade ago Time magazine reported that brain research
suggests that emotions not IQ may be the true measure of human intelligence and
the ability to delay gratification is one of the key indicators of emotional
intelligence interestingly it is also an indicator of future success the
marshmallow experiment a group of scientists created an experiment to test
emotional intelligence they told four-year-old children that
they could have one marshmallow now or if they could wait while their
researcher ran an errand they could have two they then placed a marshmallow in
front of each child and left the room some of the children waited for the
second marshmallow while others immediately devoured the one in front of
them the follow-up research was most fascinating those children who could
delay gratification generally grew up to be better adjusted more popular
adventurous confident and dependable those who couldn’t were more likely to
be lonely easily frustrated and stubborn they buckled under stress and shied away
from challenges in addition those who could delay gratification also scored an
average of two hundred and ten points higher on the SATs
my father’s epiphany I’ll never forget the night my father called us together
for a special family meeting it was after we had lost our home and all of
his children had gathered in the living room of our little duplex the mood in
our home that night was a somber as a funeral my father looked distraught we
didn’t know why he had brought us together but from his countenance we
knew it couldn’t be good he said I spent the last three days figuring out why
after all these years of hard work I have nothing to show for it but bills do
you know where it all goes to us one of my brothers asked no he said grimly I
wish it had but it doesn’t it goes to interest all those heartbeats went to
pain interest to make someone else wealthy delay gratification never borrow
money earlier in the third lesson I demonstrated the power of compound
interest never forget that compound interest is just as powerful working
against you as it is working for you what might seem like a small expense now
can in the long run still your wealth simply put there are two kinds of people
those who earn interest and those who pay it that’s the fundamental difference
between the wealthy and the desperate the millionaire mentality sees clearly
the danger of credit and knows that freedom and power are infinitely better
than short-lived pleasure but I deserve it an employee of mine desired a new car
it was too expensive for her income but she was intent on convinced me that
it was the right choice for her my husband’s about to get a raise why
shouldn’t I have a nice car don’t I deserve it
deserve it she had just regurgitated the greatest marketing sham ever propagated
on the American consumer the result of years of advertising
brainwashing she deserves what to find happiness based on something that will
decay and lose value within a year yet we’ll continue to financially enslave
her long after infatuation with the metal is gone in the words of my teenage
daughter is this a good thing after several discussions she
reluctantly chose not to buy the car a year later we were visited her decision
I’m so glad I didn’t buy that car she said it doesn’t even interest me anymore
and my husband didn’t get the raise we had planned on had we bought that car we
would have found ourselves deep in debt and struggling just to make payments the
next time you hear someone say you deserve it red flag should go up in your
mind someone is trying to take your wealth someone is trying to steal your
dreams for themselves what you really deserve is peace of mind individual
freedom and personal power the payday loans trap
remember it’s them versus us the payday loan industry is big business and
getting bigger in just eight years has grown from 10 billion dollars to 85
billion dollars and 2/3 of those funding this industry growth are women women in
financial trouble in fact one payday lenders business plan
unabashedly declares that welfare-to-work mothers are an excellent
opportunity for check cashing and cash advance businesses predatory
exploitative entrapment these are just some of the terms used to describe this
industry that should be warning enough to stay away a payday loan is a short
loan intended to supposedly help the borrower get by until the next payday
well there are laws regulating how much interest can be charged by financial
institutions these businesses get around these laws by charging fees rather than
interest these fees typically account for 15% of the loan if you do the math
you’ll realize that if you continue to repeat or roll over the loan your actual
annual interest may be as high as 400% I’ve personally witnessed the damage
using these loans can cause an employee of mine had gotten behind on her bills
and decided to get out of the bind by using a payday loan already short on
cash now with 15 percent less cash a month she was really in trouble she
found herself using cash advances more and more one day she came to me in tears
embarrassed to tell me what she had done it was so short-sighted she said it just
seemed like a quick fix it was quick but not a fix
eventually the cure became worse than the disease using payday loans can turn
a temporary financial problem into a permanent one the truth of the plastic
in 1968 credit card debt was 8 billion dollars today 40 years later that number
has increased by more than a hundred times with so much wealth at stake it’s
no wonder banks and retail businesses work so hard to extend you credit there
were five point three billion offers for new credit cards in 2007 alone and their
efforts are paying off in 1970 only 17% of American households had a bank issued
credit card today Americans owned more than a billion credit cards one in seven
carried 10 or more credit cards I met a woman at one of my seminars who had 27
different credit cards when she ran out of money on one card she simply applied
for another in addition to credit cards there are other credit inducing tactics
you might not have considered a calling credit sells tactic is the no
pain add-on purchase you’ve likely been victimized by it as a teenager I worked
at a fast food restaurant whenever we took an order we were required to ask
customers if they wanted fries or a drink to go with their order initially I
thought if they wanted fries or a drink they would have asked for it not so to
my surprise more than half the people I asked change
their order this technique works on larger purchases as well from cars to
houses unfortunately outside the fast food world there’s interest involved
would you like a refrigerator to go with that house you’ve just come to the end
of the long and tedious process of qualifying for a home loan before the
last signature is inked you’re asked do you need any appliances we could easily
add a few luxuries onto that loan how about a refrigerator what most
homebuyers don’t consider is that this additional purchase goes right on the
end of the 30-year mortgage even at a low interest rate like five percent
after five years the average cost for a $1,000 refrigerator is nearly double the
sales price and Americans wonder where their money goes what kind of fool the
poor and the uneducated are particularly susceptible to interest schemes that’s
one of the reasons they stay poor back when I worked at an advertising agency
we had a client who rented out electronic appliances you’ve seen
similar television commercials come to shams rent to own where you can have it
today as I was listing the weekly price of a VCR for a television commercial
something didn’t look right I called the store manager his price couldn’t be
right I said it says $19.99 a week for this VCR no that’s right
$20 a week for how long a year I almost choked you’re kidding me that adds up to
more than a thousand dollars for this VCR
it couldn’t have cost you more than a hundred bucks actually we got it for
sixty what kind of fool pays more than $1,000
for a $60 VCR I asked people who can’t wait
successful Ness takers are emotionally intelligent they can wait even when it’s
not the easiest course of action because of my belief in the five lessons my wife
and I decided before we were married that we would never go into debt
we found the engagement ring in the diamond we wanted but I didn’t have
enough money to pay for it believe me I was sorely tempted to break my role and
go into debt I had other pressures besides the jeweler to start a beautiful
fiancee whom I wanted to impress not to mention a future father-in-law who was
certain that I was going to keep his daughter barefoot and pregnant but with
my fiance’s support we held fast to the rule we put down money to hold the
diamond then had a cubic zirconium set into the ring no one knew the difference
except us a few months later I paid off the diamond and we swapped the stones
for the successful nest ager freedom and power are infinitely better than
momentary satisfaction mindset 3 The Millionaire mentality does not equate
spending with happiness a friend of mine had an especially hard morning at work
and found herself running to the store door lunch hour
I bought a $500 dress that I didn’t even want she said it just somehow made me
feel better like my friend too many women have
adopted shopping as catharsis shopping is therapy said the television
commercial money can buy happiness just don’t pay retail acquaintance spending
with happiness is the first step to financial self-destruction
recently I met a woman whose daughter was working three jobs trying to keep up
with her $50,000 credit-card debt what did she spend all that money on I asked
stuff clothes and stuff she had a bad marriage and she’s just trying to fill
the void unfortunately all she does now is work compulsive behaviors are the
cause of many financial disease Aster’s I remember signing copies of the
five lessons at a bookstore in Las Vegas and hearing story after story of lives
and nest-egg squandered by people with compulsive gambling habits the same is
true of compulsive spending a friend of mine has a client who has spent hundreds
of thousands of dollars in purchases she doesn’t value or use her home is
cluttered with stacks of unopened boxes and department store sacks with price
tags still attached it’s gotten so bad that she cannot sleep in her own bed
because it’s covered with junk she’s not really shopping for anything except the
high that comes from shopping another friend of mine divorced his wife after
she refused to get help for her shopping problem before she could spend him into
oblivion as he helped her pack her belongings he found among many other
things three identical Chanel purses still in
their boxes with their hefty price tags still attached all these examples are
extreme they are demonstrative of the power of this addiction compulsive
spending is still not listed by the American Psychiatric Association as a
distinct disorder but some experts believe it might soon be compulsive
spending follows the same pattern of other addictive cycles with the
compulsive spender the purchase of something creates a temporary
psychological high then after that high dissipates and it always does the addict
finds herself dealing with the aftermath of her choices usually a combination of
negative emotions guilt fear and shame the addict now suffering from this
painful low naturally seeks relief so she goes shopping again to create a new
high establishing a powerful and dangerous cycle one of the distinct
problems with this form of addiction is the lack of negative social consequence
while a drunk is shunned looked down on or thrown in jail the compulsive spender
is praised and adored by salespeople thanked by the recipients of their gifts
and even extolled by the President of the United States for doing their
dooty by spending of course compulsive shopping is not just a woman’s issue and
some research suggests that compulsive shopping is on the rise among men still
it’s my experience that this problem is more often a woman’s addiction of choice
if you find yourself purchasing things you don’t need just for the thrill of
buying or if you knowingly buy things you can’t afford you might need help
there’s good news remember just because you have compulsive tendencies doesn’t
mean you’re doomed to financial failure in fact the opposite is true your
weakness may become your greatest asset remember what Heather wrote in the
foreword about changing her behavior she took her compulsive shopping habits
redirected them to purchasing precious metals instead of junk and in a
relatively short time created a healthy nest egg the successful nesting of
fosters gratitude as a strategy against materialism and unhappiness one of the
great cures for consumption is found in the character trait of gratitude we live
in a world of abundance the things that bring the greatest joy are not reserved
for the wealthy alone the simplest of pleasures can bring the greatest
happiness what price can we put on inner peace or health or friendship or love
those who forget to be grateful for what they have often waste their lives and
wealth looking for more their thirst becomes unquenchable as they seek to buy
what cannot be bought it doesn’t matter if these people have one dollar or a
billion because they will never have contentment or happiness they may be in
a high tax bracket but they will never be truly wealthy mindset for the
millionaire mentality protects the nest egg successful nest acres do not risk
what they cannot afford to lose this applies to both investing and living
high risk get-rich-quick schemes and other forms of gambling do not appeal to
them when I surveyed my female readers about what they’ve
was the biggest financial weakness the number-one answer was being an easy
touch Angela this is not a real name was widowed at a young age with three small
children this could have been a financial nightmare however her husband
had insurance and investments and left her a significant amount of money about
five years after her husband’s death Angela remarried she was happy for
companionship and madly in love her new husband a real estate developer
convinced her not only to invest all her money in his business but to mortgage
her house which was paid off as well less than two years into the marriage
not only had he lost all of her money but she caught him cheating on her they
divorced leaving Angela emotionally and financially broken and living in near
poverty with her children most women and men want to be trusting they want to
believe in a happy ending and that the person they love will look out for their
best interest women need to acknowledge that while this mindset is a beautiful
hope it’s also a potential danger and they should put appropriate safeguards
in place wise behavior is not a matter of trust it’s a matter of wisdom that
significant other who might lose all your money might actually have your best
interests at heart it doesn’t matter throughout my financial history I have
lost more money to people who met me well than two people who meant me harm
in other words more financial harm has come from my friends than from my
enemies your spouse may be the kindest most loving and trustworthy person on
the planet but it doesn’t mean that he can protect your assets good people lose
money every day Angela should have decided what she could afford to lose
before she put her money and her children’s future at risk before she
remarried Angela should have transferred the home and much of her assets into a
trust for her children guaranteeing that they would always be taken care of
proper insurance insurance has been a for a long time in fact insurance
existed around 3000 BC in China it was later used in ancient Babylon and by the
Phoenicians Hindus and Greeks purchasing a proper amount of insurance is an
important financial issue my parents didn’t believe in insurance
early in their marriage they had purchased a policy that didn’t pay out
when they needed it and they decided that insurance was just a scam that’s
why when my father broke his legs he didn’t have insurance even with all the
pain I had experienced growing up without insurance my first year of
marriage I followed my parents example fortunately my wife Carrie felt
differently she found an inexpensive health insurance policy for university
students and applied for it three weeks after she did I was rushed to the
hospital for an emergency appendectomy the cost of the surgery would have put
us deep in debt thankfully due to my wife’s wisdom we were spared much pain
successful wealth builders purchased proper insurance to protect their
growing wealth a study conducted by a Harvard Law School professor found that
medical bills and other financial effects of illness or injury contributed
to nearly half of the personal bankruptcy filings in the United States
having proper insurance can make the difference between financial peace of
mind and catastrophe successful wealth builders ask themselves is the person
I’m trusting with my wealth sufficiently skilled to handle my money in the
richest man in Babylon George s claisen tells the story of a man who entrusts
his hard-earned money to his friend a bricklayer to purchase precious gems of
course the bricklayer knows nothing about precious gems and he returns with
worthless pieces of glass trust bricklayers with advice about bricks
says his mentor be especially careful with your money when it comes to family
this is what I call the brother-in-law syndrome as your wealth grows you will
be set upon by others usually in laws it seems to me to fund their schemes and
business ventures they will often use emotional
manipulation to get you to part with your money be kind and simply say let’s
take your plan to an expert in the field in most cases this will end the inquiry
it’s not easy to say no to a loved one but seeing them lose your money is worse
much worse and in the end no one is happy burnt toast syndrome one of the
most destructive of all female financial behaviors is what I call burnt toast
syndrome the first time I shared this discovery with a group of women I was
surprised at how affected they were in fact they were speechless a few of them
started crying afterward I asked how many of them were victims of burnt toast
syndrome every hand in the room shot up this is how I explained burnt toast
syndrome you’re making breakfast for your family and there’s not bread for
only one piece of toast per person you accidentally burn one of them who takes
the burnt piece the answer women usually give me is me the same holds true for
their finances even though women live longer than men and need more retirement
money set aside most simply don’t do it which is why the average income for a
woman over 65 is less than $7,000 a year one of the reasons for this disturbing
trend is that others gradually and quietly still their retirements from
them children and other relatives often prey on women mothers aunts grandmothers
to part with very real future needs for those relatives immediate selfish wants
it’s a daughter who needs an expensive prom dress or the son who needs that
$200 pair of basketball shoes in the moment it often seems easier to just
give in and surrender your future funds some women thrive on the attention they
receive as a benefactor they don’t still for me I’m happy to give it away one
woman said forcely trying to convince herself that she was doing good one man
I know from a wealthy family has learned to play his mother like a violin at the
age of 30 and with several children he’s never held a job for more than a few
months his other is disappointed with his habits
but is unwilling to let her grandchildren suffer she’s a reluctant
enabler and continues to do great harm to both her son and her grandchildren
let me be clear this is absolutely wrong it’s wrong on two levels
first it’s never okay to give up a need for someone else’s wants never you can
try to rationalize it but it’s just plain stupidity second the lessons
taught to the recipient of remarkably damaging how would you feel if you
discovered that your children were stealing from an elderly widows pension
to buy themselves concert tickets or conned a woman down the street out of
her Social Security check so they could buy a motorcycle obviously you would be
disgusted but that’s exactly what you’re doing when you give up that future
income for their wants those who practice this kind of giving are
practicing a kind of financial suicide and raising children to be selfish and
entitled they are creating pathetic weak people who unable to stand on their own
feet will continue to prey on others their entire lives as Clementine paddle
Ford wrote never put a wishbone daughter wear a backbone ought to be if you’re
not willing to do what’s right because it’s right for you then do it because
it’s right for your children in the end whether you win in the margins to
creating extra income or through savings both will get you to where you want to
be but serious wealth accumulators employ both to help them reach their
goals lesson five give back what I spent is gone when I kept I lost but what I
gave away will be mine forever Ethel Percy Andrus ultimately the most
honorable and enjoyable use of money is in serving others freely giving of our
wealth is also the only way to fully protect ourselves from our wealth yes
money is a powerful ally but it can also be a spiritual and emotional
enemy all money is an inescapable part of life it’s not life if money becomes
what you live for you will eventually conclude that life is not worth living I
was signing books at a bookstore when I noticed a young woman in line who was
clearly very excited to meet me when it was her turn to approach my table she
could barely constrain herself mr. Evans she exclaimed I’ve wanted to
meet you my entire life flattered I replied so you like my books never read
them she quickly replied I looked at her with amusement then why did you want to
meet me a big smile crossed her face I’m one of your Christmas box house kids her
words hit me with great impact how are you I asked I’m great she replied she
put her arm around the blonde teenage boy standing next to her this is my
brother Eric she said my caseworker told me that if it wasn’t for you we probably
would not have been adopted into the same family I’ve always wanted to thank
you for my brother I asked if she wanted to help me sign books and for the next
hour we drank slushies and talked about life success in life cannot be measured
on a balance sheet I believe that the truest measure of achievement is the
degree to which we’ve learned to love and service through sharing our wealth
and our time is love made visible financial Karma while generosity feeds
the soul ironically it also feeds the pocketbook I believe that we receive as
we give it is written in the Bible will a man Rob God yet you have robbed me but
you say where and have we robbed thee in tithes and offerings prove me now
herewith if I will not open you the windows of heaven and pour you out a
blessing that there shall not be room enough to receive it
Malachi 2 8 to 10 well I don’t believe that this promise written in the Bible
applies solely to financial blessings I believe there are karmic principles
attached to wealth we get back when we give as
such it’s important to give not just after we’ve achieved wealth but as part
of the process I have tithe 10% of my income since I
was eight years old and in spite of the hardships my family has sometimes faced
I have never felt the loss of this money rather I have felt specifically blessed
from my contributions on one occasion when my business was doing poorly I
called my accountant and asked him to review my financial records over the
past year to see if I had in fact paid a true tithe of 10% he called back the
next day and told me that I was 800 dollars short I wrote a check
immediately and send it off the next day I had three calls from former clients
needing work done immediately coincidence maybe but I don’t think so
I’ve heard similar stories from friends and associates of different faiths from
around the world in addition to sharing your wealth you have a responsibility to
share the lessons of proper money management with others within 24 hours
of hearing this audio book share this audiobook with a spouse a child a
girlfriend or a colleague then as your life improves share your successes with
others your example will encourage them to follow your lead as you share these
principles you will see firsthand the gift to giving back teaching the five
lessons to others will help you internalize them and become better
prepared to live and enjoy the fruits of them yourself conclusion is it ever too
late to start a reporter was in my office interviewing me when he noticed
the cover of the five lessons on my desk he asked me what the book was about I
briefly explained the five principles of wealth then invited him to attend one of
my seminars I could use that he said but I’m afraid it’s too late to my surprise
his eyes welled up with tears my daughter called this morning she needs
money for college I had to tell her that I can’t help her I just don’t have it is
it ever too late to live these principles my answer is a resounding no
yes it can be too late to take full advantage of the power of compound
interest but progress is progress it’s never too late to do the right thing or
the smart thing and enjoy the benefits it brings our getting back to my niece’s
story just one year into practicing the five lessons she was light years ahead
of where she had been and was free of the daily fear and bondage of debt she
and her husband were already enjoying more of the blessings of living in this
free and abundant country most important they had hope and hope is always worth
striving for we end where we begin life is not about money it’s about God it’s
about love it’s about family and relationships and sharing with you these
principles it’s my hope that you will always give back that you might find
life’s true abundance all millionaires die but there are no dead millionaires
their wealth passes on as Ray Kroc the founder of McDonald’s was fond of saying
I’ve never seen a Brinks truck following a hearse if you have lived successfully
your estate will consist of more than material possessions and your legacy
will be more than a ledger sheet remember this you may use your wealth
wisely find true abundance and live as Mark Twain said so that even the
Undertaker mourns your passing in the end this is true wealth now I’d like to
end with this final note I have an idea a big idea but before I share it with
you I want you to take a moment and seriously consider this question what
kind of a world would we live in if only the bad people had money it would be a
dark world indeed there would be no parks or museums schools and churches
would shut down and hospitals would help only the elite few most of us would be
enslaved if not with physical chains than with financial ones with this in
mind I’ll share my idea or maybe I should say dream over the past 20 years
I’ve seen the power of the five lessons change people’s lives not only
financially but emotionally mentally and spiritually a
well I’ve seen my wonderful readers give back by reaching out in helping one
another to succeed I wish that more good people had wealth this has led me to my
dream I dream of creating a community of 1
million compassionate millionaires wealthy people who used their power to
improve their lives their communities and the world around them we’re
accomplishing this dream with an online wealth club called the 5 lessons
Institute that provides powerful weekly mentoring teleclasses monthly and weekly
plans of action and powerful tools to aid you in your wealth accumulation as a
member of this community you’ll be able to share with other members and watch
your wealth grow and the communities wealth grown we’ll do it together
imagine mean 1 of a million people around the globe following the same
success strategy we have already established relationships with hundreds
of major retailers who offer special discounts to our community talk about
strength in numbers while others are treading Financial waters will be
swimming ahead to success obviously it’ll be expensive to run this Institute
but by spreading the cost out over the whole community you’ll receive thousands
of dollars of benefits for very little the price to join the 5 lessons wealth
club is very low just ten dollars to join and $9.95 a month per family and
because we believe in giving back part of that will go directly to charity
incredible idea isn’t it and timely if the economy is the Titanic this is a
lifeboat but this plan is helpful not only right now in a time of economic
crisis but also in times of prosperity when we can really build wealth
if this sounds great to you you’re not alone already thousands have joined us
if you’re ready to join our community then go to five lessons dot-com
and sign up online and welcome to the revolution thank you for watching this
video my friends I hope you really enjoyed it make sure you leave a comment
below and please subscribe to this channel I want to give you so much more
thank you and I’ll see you next time Women’s Edition: 5 POWERFUL Lessons A Millionaire Taught Me About Life, Wealth & Success (Audiobook)


  1. i'm Isaac 2 you says:

    Dam i haven't even listened to the video yet but I know this is going to be deep just by the description.

  2. Sibu Bhai says:

    Great video

  3. Erica The Inspirerer MAYS says:

    I am a millionaire! I am in connection with Universal Source Energy. Money comes to me quickly and effortlessly.

  4. Prophetess Queen says:

    Only for women? ? Why? Oh, because according to statistics, women buy more books. Please don't downgrade our intelligence by catering to us. All humans have the same concerns, no matter their gender. This tactic through me off completely and your video sounds so scripted.

  5. Inspirofreak by Jana du Toit says:

    Malachi 3:8-10

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