Everyone’s a Republican On Tax Day

Everyone’s a Republican On Tax Day


– Ugh, I couldn’t believe I owed so much money again this year. – I know, I got eaten alive on taxes. – Tax trouble, ay? (booming drum) (dramatic trumpet) Well, that can be a real hornets’ nest. – Who are you? – Tucker P. Whiteman’s the
name and I may just have a solution to your April 15th problem. – Do you work for the IRS or something? (cymbals crashing)
– Heavens, no. I work for the grandest tax
relief organization of ’em all, the GOP. (dramatic drum boom)
– The Republican Party? – That’s right my boy. Everyone’s a Republican on Tax Day. – They are? – You betcha. Young Miss isn’t it
(Lily grunts) – shocking how much you
owe greedy old Uncle Sam. – It is. – Careful Lily. – Imagine a world where
you can take your tax money and do with it what you please. (bells chiming) – That sounds wonderful. – Why, you could save it, or invest it, or give to charity, or buy grenades. – What?
– Give to charity. Now, I know you young folks all think the Republican Party is a bunch of stuffy old fuddy-duddies. – Kind of. – Well, there are lots
of young Republicans who just wanna save a little money and think that Sandy
Hook was a false flag. – Uh, good God! Lily I know taxes are a drag but they pay for important things. – Eh-ha, like what? – Ah, roads. – Toll roads. – Schools. – Private schools. – Or the fire department. – Now listen here, if
somebody can’t afford their monthly fire bill I can’t help them. – Yeah, why should I be responsible for putting out some freeloader’s fire? If they leave the gas on why
shouldn’t their house burn? – Lily! – Ha-ho that’s the spirit. (upbeat music) (deep drum with bell chimes) See the grand old party is grand because you sir, you madam,
will keep what’s yours. (trumpets blaring) Yes the poorest are
borest, you all hate wars and can’t afford stores
and act like whores. But the rich have a
niche, here’s my pitch, we’ll fix the glitch that
makes our nation weak. (cheerful music) I want you to keep your money. ♪ Why don’t you ♪ ♪ Why don’t I ♪ ♪ You can keep your
money and you just have ♪ ♪ To let children die in cages ♪ – Stop this! This is horrible! These kinds of economics
have never worked before and not only that you have to sign on to all the other shit the
Republican Party stands for. Are you really ready to do that? (dramatic drumming) – Well how much money would I save? – How much did you make last year? – Like $50,000. (dramatic drumming) – Oh. Yeah, we don’t give a fuck about you. $50,000 that’s it? – That’s a lot. (Tucker burps) – I don’t feel good. I have to, I have to, get the lead out, get the lead out, get the lead out, get the lead out, get the lead out. I’m just (vomits) uh-hu-hu-hu (taps cane) Oh. – It’s the most I’ve ever made. – Oh God! Oh God! Is that true?
– Yes (Tucker vomits)

90 Comments

  1. CollegeHumor says:

    Sign up for DROPOUT! https://bit.ly/2OWs9qI

    Download the INTERNATIONAL app here: https://bit.ly/2OiNNoP

  2. BJ Chester says:

    Strawmen, strawmen everywhere. Libertarianism is the simplest and most philosophically consistent choice anyway. Low taxes across the board and the government can't tell you who you can marry, what drugs you take or whether you can have an abortion.

  3. BJ Chester says:

    They were putting kids in cages under Obama and you had no problem paying into Obamacare, just saying.

  4. Cassidy says:

    As a Republican, I can confirm that we all dress like that and carry canes. Trump rallies are QUITE spiffy.

  5. the epic soul slayer says:

    I'm 10 and I'm a Republican wer for public democracies are for the crack

  6. Barro the Broadcaster says:

    I'm a registered Democrat and I honestly think the Left is worse than the Right…

  7. Gabriel J says:

    Libertarians:A S C E N D E D

  8. Jamie R says:

    still thirsty on main for grant

  9. Demarco Miller says:

    everyones a liberal when they face any adversity at all

  10. Speedbumps Suck says:

    This is nothing like a Republican. Liberals trying to paint Republicans as being the bad one. Liberals are psychotic one

  11. Speedbumps Suck says:

    And all the insinuations about children dying in cages… The pictures you saw were from the Obama Administration. And all the other claims that you tried putting on are wrong

  12. Marco Dimbo says:

    :3 …… Is this ass-hole's surname "Whitemann". I'm dead.

  13. mikecharliesierra says:

    That’s the largest straw man I have ever seen.

  14. Arden Sloan says:

    Yes, generic actor put there to argue against strawman arguments, it is.
    Children dying in cages? Really? You people are sick.
    Just everything about this video was horrible and dishonest.

  15. BVSchaefer says:

    Do they really think city and county fire departments are funded by federal taxes?

  16. Memegod jodox says:

    we advocate for no taxes actually.

  17. drlax15m says:

    This was horrible, but still good for a few laughs

  18. Pyro Sapien says:

    Y is buying weapons bad to, what happened to individual Liberty you collectivist hacks

  19. Payton says:

    Oh well

  20. Benjamin Whitley says:

    Republicans have successfully fooled the American people into thinking that the rich should pay no taxes and the poor should pay all the taxes, instead of the other way around.

  21. OLe Jack Green The weird green guy says:

    Are Republicans war obsessed and violent greedy snobs

  22. S theking says:

    guys, I don't care if the video is political or not, this is a comedy channel, they don't cause the arguments in the comments, the idiots do
    why does pornhub have a better community?

  23. B Sadi says:

    Erm, dunno about the new members .. the lady is alright , the dude screams high school project acting.

  24. Garvey Peterson says:

    Katie's a senior poop advisor,huh? makes sense.

  25. Stephen says:

    token asians

  26. Thomas Pastor says:

    Annnnnnnnd now, it's time for our favorite game, COMMENT WARS! Tune in to the comment section every hour to see conservatives wasting time trying to convince people of their idiotic views, and liberals wasting theirs trying to respond!

  27. Tong Wu says:

    Not gonna lie but the Asian girl is pretty hot

  28. Megagamer870 says:

    This has a lot of bias in it and as a republican I can tell you we are not like this. This type of campaigning by berating republicans to just the bad parts like trump is stupid and offensive. It would be great to see you talk about democrat extremists or the fact that democrats always think they are making a difference but instead you throw your hogwash views into our faces.

  29. RobDon says:

    I feel like spending my return on a monorail

  30. Lucas Rodmo says:

    If you make 50,000 USD in my country you're legit the top 10%

  31. Cameron Goode says:

    You get a dislike on account of the music number is super poorly done.

  32. Jennifer Sheehan says:

    Bruh this is kinda a gross generalization of Republicans

  33. Ryan De Silva says:

    The Communist party is the best party.

  34. English_w/o_GMO says:

    "this kind of economics never worked before" – said a socialist

  35. YelloTrout says:

    Everyone’s a Libertarian on Tax Day

  36. Dr. Fiji says:

    damn. i really supported college humor. didn’t realize they were so liberal

  37. Abitamim Bharmal says:

    Vast majority of fire fighters are white men. Democrats: Bad. Collegehumour: Firefighters are supported by Democrats

  38. Evan Cisneros says:

    Tf you mean capitalism never works socialism is ass

  39. Thug Rose says:

    Hey CH republicans aren’t anarchists. We still want taxes collected for provision of public goods such as roads military police and the fire force

  40. Abhimanyu Karnawat says:

    This is what envy looks like,all Republicans want to lower taxes for all people but "Democrats" (Read lying, incompetent,envy,resentful) "these kind of economics have never worked" Lol coming from commies and socialists? News flash you deserve your poverty.

  41. Abhimanyu Karnawat says:

    Also you idiots realise that fire department, roads and all the things mentioned in the video cost less than 1% of the budget, and most of it goes to Medicare and Medicaid and Wars

  42. Ashonestasa Fox aka As Honest As A Fox says:

    Democrats: we want your taxes for social causes
    Republicans: we want your taxes for defense

    Libertarians: we don’t want your taxes at all. Keep em hoe.

  43. TrapSkateLive says:

    Parties don't matter… There's your next one 💯

  44. seth arnaud says:

    I agree that republicans sick. That's why I'm libertarian.

  45. hfredydl says:

    Yeah, if it was just federal taxes that would be fine … but CA likes to add a ridiculous state tax, sales tax, property tax, gas taxes, and let’s not forget hidden taxes like registration car fees…if you work this state robs you

  46. M.A. __ C. says:

    This but all year

  47. James McCormick says:

    “You can keep your money you just to let kids die in cages” LOL

  48. Samuel Muller says:

    To be fair – only 53% of everyone is a Republican on tax day…

  49. Andrew Swierkosz says:

    Everyday is sunny is Ancapistan

  50. Aaron Smith says:

    Lol Grant with the Supreme Shade.

  51. Spencer Leonardi says:

    Lol republicans are half the country, $50,000 is almost in the top 20%

  52. OLe Jack Green The weird green guy says:

    I wouldn't mind having some brats die in cages
    And buying granades
    And insulting Uncle Sam for being a greedy ass

  53. Jorens Raitums says:

    0:22 illuminati

  54. Goah Way says:

    You can keep your money you just have to let children die in cagessssss

    Lmfao

  55. YoungGonDa125 says:

    Ever since these two Asians came in collegehumour has gone down the shitter

  56. Nobiles Novus homo says:

    Who has more to lose? Who has more to live for? Return to the Old Right! (there was no slavery involved for those of you who are illiterate of history). Instead of paying $8 at the grocery store pay $12 at the grocery store, if you want your taxes so much. Over 50 percent of the federal budget is spent on health and human services, and Social Security, 16 percent military (politico 2015). how "must" we spend more on healthcare. Also the rich pay 34 percent of their income on taxes, after profitting from something that serves a purpose to someone.

  57. Ambar Craft says:

    And I am NOT an USA citizen on any day! I LOVE it!

  58. Frank Castle says:

    If only the reps would eliminate taxes for the little guy instead of just the wealthy…

  59. leon musial says:

    Geez id hate to see how he'd react to my £14,000 a year

  60. Kim Inseong says:

    Am I the only one who think Grant looks like silent comedian Harold Lloyd with that outfits?

  61. Shaughnessy Neal says:

    Racist AF.

  62. Ryan Smith says:

    1:04 "They pay for important things". Funniest joke from Collegehumor yet.

  63. Shaun Delorez RM says:

    A HAHAHAHAHA. Holy shit!

  64. Remy Fagerstrom says:

    So the US has the highest military budget in the world. Republicans love war. But they hate taxes. And taxes pay the budget. So really, they hate war.

  65. SleepWalker says:

    As a foreigner, i'm curious, is there in US a political force, that would stand for both, social and economical freedom?

  66. Kristopher Klein Clemeno says:

    Tax Day = everyone's a Republican
    Medical Bills = everyone's a Democrat

  67. zhess 4096 says:

    TRIGGERED ANCAPS

  68. Carter tyree says:

    Actually his opinions point more twards the libertarian party because of making America be run by the free market

  69. S0VEREIGN2155 says:

    Shit isn’t funny when you know these losers are liberals

  70. Lucas says:

    There is nothing fiscally conservative about the Republicans. They're just as wasteful and generous to their corporate donors.

  71. Electro Squid says:

    "These kids of economics have never worked before". Yeah you know Hong Kong, Singapore, Macau, Monaco and Cayman Islands are all big shitholes right?

  72. CitanulsPumpkin says:

    Being a Republican sounds great!… Except for all the out of touch billionaires, and the tiki torch waving white nationalists, and the religious extremists, and the hard line Ayn Rand worshipping libertarians, and the serial rapists that spend all their non rape time bitching and moaning about feminism, and the gun nuts that shoot up schools, stores, concerts, parades, and night clubs, and the internet trolls who have fabricated the last 12 or so online "gate" controversies, and the neo nazis. Can't fucking forget the neo nazis.

  73. silverblade357 says:

    So, either my taxes make the rich richer or steadily increase to provide upkeep for the welfare state… does either party have anything to offer the middle class?

  74. Phelan Nyvoll Walker says:

    Americans hardly pay any taxes. I don’t SEE what there is to complain about! In Norway a person who earns 50000$ pays about 30% in tax! And we have free healthcare and university and loads of other good things

  75. Rene Ferret says:

    Oh you commies and the way you portray us republicans. 🤣

  76. Tesseract 14 says:

    or a libertarian

  77. Felix Schrider says:

    whilst I don't entirely agree… still fucking hilarious.

  78. Alex Libman says:

    Communist propaganda.

  79. loredana godorogea says:

    So democrats are everyone who can’t afford to become republican? 😹

  80. Generic Username says:

    OOOOOH NOOOO. Here we go. Now we just need a string of skits about: sexism, racism, homophobia, and "THE PATRIARCHY". Additionally, each skit needs to be incrementally more cringy than the last.

  81. Todd Judd says:

    Why should we give the.democrats more of our money if the cant us what we already give them

  82. Jeremy Higgins says:

    Hmm…Grant cannot sing, but Lily can. Interesting.

  83. Rasmus Bergström says:

    Good now do one on democrats

  84. Flame Tree says:

    Yay libtards

  85. Jeremy Kipp says:

    4k Republican "Snow Flakes"

  86. Tad Dunavan says:

    Best part's at 1:22 Luh-lilly! Haha.

  87. silverfreedoms says:

    You remember when our taxes were used to pay for things like roads, and now they're used for racism walls or givewaways to the rich ?

  88. Brian Wesley says:

    50k used to be both my parent's income

  89. Jack Brothers says:

    Lol, they don’t get politics at all

  90. English_w/o_GMO says:

    Socialist: this kind of economics never worked before
    Oh the irony…

  91. Nelson Alger says:

    Ancap gang rise up

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